THE WEST WING TRANSCRIPT: 365 Days (S6E12)

THE WEST WING
6X12 - “365 DAYS”
WRITTEN BY MARK GOFFMAN
DIRECTED BY ANDREW BERNSTEIN

Transcribed by Walking, Talking, And Yelling At Clouds
(kegofglory.blogspot.com)

TEASER

365 DAYS

FADE IN: INT. - ROOSEVELT ROOM – DAY

TOBY is being interviewed for TV. We see several TV monitors showing TOBY and the INTERVIEWER as ANNABETH, CAROL, and others look on.

INTERVIEWER
Well, the speech was one of the President’s best, and thank you for not making it too long.

TOBY
We were aiming for pith.

INTERVIEWER
And you succeeded. We’ve been speaking with Toby Ziegler, author of President Bartlet’s final State of the Union address. Thank you.

TOBY
Pleasure.

A DIRECTOR calls out ‘Clear’ as the interview ends and TOBY and the INTERVIEWER stand. CAROL hands a folder to TOBY.

INTERVIEWER
That was great. That section on prescription drugs, I was wondering if the coverage was the same -

TOBY
I’m sorry, I’ve gotta … uh …

CAROL
CJ’s waiting for you.

TOBY
Thanks.

CAROL (handing TOBY some notes)
And here.

CUT TO: INT. - HALLWAY – DAY

TOBY comes out of the Roosevelt Room, holding a cup of coffee, and meets CJ as she walks down the corridor.

CJ
Congratulations.

TOBY
Don’t.

CJ
Dials soared.

TOBY
Please don’t.

CJ
Don’t get me started on the crosstabs.

TOBY
Trying not to, in fact.

There is a slight pause.

TOBY
Is he here yet?

CJ
Any minute.

TOBY
We sure – we sure he’s ready for this?

CJ
He says he is.

TOBY
Still, 7 am …

CJ
It’s the only time we could fit it into everyone’s schedule. Says he has some thoughts he wants to share.

TOBY
Some thoughts?

CAROL crosses behind TOBY and CJ.

CAROL
Fantastic speech, Toby.

TOBY
Oh, thank you.

CJ
You really can’t take a compliment.

TOBY
Oh, no.

CJ
Taylor Reid even said it was the President’s finest State of the Union.

TOBY
Yeah, ‘cause it’s his last.

CUT TO: INT. - CAR – DAY

LEO is riding in the back of a car. We hear the news announcer on the radio as he sits, tapping his fingers on his thigh.

ANNOUNCER (VO)
In last night’s State of the Union address, the President called for the largest expansion of the Earned Income Tax Credit in more than fifty -

The car pulls to a stop.

DRIVER
Here we are, sir.

LEO
Yeah.

ANNOUNCER (VO)
Turning to international news, President Bartlet announced a joint Sino-American task force -

The ANNOUNCER’s voice fades as LEO opens the door and gets out of the car. He looks around, takes a moment, then walks into the entrance of the West Wing.

CUT TO: INT. - WEST WING FOYER – DAY

GUARD
Good to have you back, Mr. McGarry.

LEO (signing in)
Thanks, Brian.

As LEO walks into the foyer, a WOMAN crosses in front of him.

WOMAN
Good to have you back, Mr. McGarry.

LEO continues down a hallway, eventually opening the door of CJ’s old Press Secretary office, which will become his. Inside he finds a group of the Presidential staff, including CJ, TOBY, ANNABETH, KATE, WILL, CHARLIE, ED, LARRY, and an INTERN. They all applaud, and LEO smiles broadly.

CJ
Welcome back, boss.

LEO
Thought we were keeping this low-key, just a couple of us kicking a few ideas around?

CJ (kissing LEO on the cheek)
This is low-key, Annabeth wanted to bring in the Marine marching band.

LEO (as everyone chuckles)
Ahh …

CJ
Word got out and everybody wanted to come, and hear what you had to say.

WILL
Good to see you, Leo.

OTHERS
Welcome back. Welcome back, Leo.

LEO
Thanks, thanks. (seeing TOBY) Ah – man of the hour.

WILL (as all applaud)
Hear, hear. Come now, no false modesty.

TOBY
It’s actually self-loathing.

CHARLIE
It was a great speech.

CJ
Charlie, Toby. Have you met?

ANNABETH
Press response has been terrific. (to TOBY) Stop being such a pill.

LEO
Well … I really wasn’t -

We hear KATE’s Blackberry beeping. She pulls it out to read it.

LEO
- expecting to have to address a convention but I can -

CJ
Before we get started, we all got you a little something.

ED hands LEO a package.

LEO
Completely unnecessary, truly.

CJ’s Blackberry now starts beeping, and she takes hers out as well.

TOBY 
Just for the record, I voted for the watch.

LEO (opening the package)
My very own defibrillator.

Everyone chuckles.

LEO
Well, like I was saying, um … I wasn’t really expecting to discuss this with such a large group, but … I’ve been thinking, and this might be an excellent time to -

There is a knock at the door, and a military OFFICER appears.

OFFICER
Commander?

KATE (exiting)
Uh, sorry.

LEO
No problem. I rather unexpectedly found myself with a bit of spare time on my hands these last few months. We’ve been here, seven trips around the sun.

Now WILL’s pager goes off.

LEO
Done some things we’re proud of. Things we’re less pleased about -

WILL
Uh, the Vice President, I should probably … 

LEO
Sure.

WILL (exiting)
Just be a minute.

LEO
It may be time for us to take our own temperature – an internal inventory.

KATE appears back in the doorway.

KATE
Can I borrow CJ for a moment?

CJ (exiting)
Sorry.

LEO
Sure. What’s done, what’s undone – what’s done that we’d like to undo – or, do over … do away with …

We now see CJ and KATE talking just outside LEO’s office.

KATE
Demonstration in Bolivia outside our embassy. Big one.

CJ
Over the ambassador’s statement.

KATE
It’s being seen as interfering in their election.

CJ
The guy is a Socialist.

KATE
Yeah.

CJ
Who says, if elected, he’ll immediately halt their coca eradication program.

KATE
Yep.

CJ (beat)
We should get into this.

KATE
I’ll call DOD, Intel, the Undersecretary for Low Grade Conflicts.

CJ
We have an Undersecretary for Low Grade Conflicts?

KATE
Be glad he’s who I’m calling.

KATE walks away as CJ goes back into LEO’s office, where he is still talking.

LEO
… fight the seduction of tumult for tumult’s sake.

CJ
I need Charlie.

LEO
Of course.

CJ leads CHARLIE out into the hallway.

CJ
There’s a situation in Bolivia.

CHARLIE
Serious?

CJ
Low grade, evidently. Get with Margaret, see what meetings you can cover, what needs to be moved.

CHARLIE
Okay.

CJ
What’s Leo talking about in there?

CHARLIE
I’m really not sure.

As CJ and CHARLIE continue on their ways, we see WILL talking on his cell phone in the policy bullpen.

WILL (into phone)
Sir, one week doesn’t seem … can we discuss it?

CUT TO: INT. - LEO’S OFFICE – DAY

ED
Didn’t we just kind of do this? Taking inventory?

LARRY
Little thing called the State of the Union.

LEO
The State of the Union was fine -

CAROL steps into the office.

CAROL
Excuse me, Leo. (to ANNABETH) Labor Secretary’s panicked about his press conference.

ANNABETH
I’ll be right back. (exiting) Man’s an infant. It’s about time he got a good spanking.

TOBY
I’d better, uh …

LEO
Referee.

TOBY (exiting)
Sorry.

CHARLIE comes back to the doorway.

LEO
Welcome back.

CHARLIE (referring to ED and LARRY)
Actually, just came to get these guys. Situation. Juggling some things.

LEO
Go on.

CHARLIE takes ED and LARRY out of the office. Only LEO and the INTERN are left. LEO looks around uncomfortably.

INTERN
Are we done, Mr. McGarry?

LEO
No. Not yet.

LEO turns to a whiteboard set up next to the window. He picks up a marker and writes ‘365,’ then underlines it twice.

SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES.
END TEASER.
***

ACT ONE

FADE IN: INT. - OVAL OFFICE – DAY

DR. MIKE GORDON is examining BARTLET. He is wearing a stethoscope as he removes a blood pressure cuff. ABBEY is seated nearby, reading.

GORDON
Balance is back. Any numbness? Pain?

BARTLET
Physical or existential?

GORDON (chuckling)
Any chance of getting the odd straight answer?

ABBEY
Good luck with that.

BARTLET
Nada. Spiritual or otherwise. (to ABBEY) You don’t have to go.

ABBEY
They’ll think we’re northeast Yankee elitists. 

BARTLET
And be correct.

ABBEY
We could make the occasional effort.

BARTLET
Five hundred laps around an oval. An entire sport predicated on the expectation of the grand ginn-ol.

ABBEY
Guignol, Guignol. If you’re going to brag about your intellectual hauteur, at least get your fancy references right. Grand Guignol, connoting the sanguinary, buckets of blood, like – hockey.

BARTLET
Leave my Bruins out of this.

GORDON (handing a folder to ABBEY)
Martinsville Speedway. You’re in for a treat.

ABBEY
See, there are people with most of their teeth that are actual NASCAR fans.

BARTLET (to GORDON)
Are you really a doctor, I didn’t get a close look at your credentials.

GORDON
First in my class. University of Daytona.

BARTLET
Oooh, now who’s with the not-so-straight answers?

ABBEY (to GORDON)
He prefers to be the amusing one. Fun for the rest of us. So, is he well enough to join me?

GORDON
Uh, pressure, vitals are fine, but I’d rather he didn’t push himself after last night.

BARTLET
Dang.

ABBEY (to GORDON)
He put you up to this.

BARTLET (to ABBEY, kissing her on the cheek)
Enjoy the Grand Guignol. Horror and sensationalism, not blood. Look it up.

As ABBEY and GORDON leave, BARTLET knocks on the door of CJ’s office and leans inside.

BARTLET
The President will see you now.

As BARTLET returns to the Oval Office, TOBY, KATE and CJ file in behind him.

KATE
Sir, Zalaya’s now polling a close second in Bolivia.

BARTLET
Wasn’t he fourth? Maybe our ambassador can say something new and inflammatory, help him bridge that final gap.

CJ
There’s concern about rioting outside our embassy.

KATE
We need you to make a statement affirming our impartiality.

BARTLET
You mean, pretend to a disinterest no one’s gonna believe because some diplomat happened to have too much - what do they drink down there?

TOBY
As I recall the ambassador’s not a stickler, sir.

BARTLET
I’m not declaring to an indifference that’ll provoke international guffaws.

KATE
Sir, if Zalaya wins he’s pledged to renationalize their industries, stop payment on their six billion dollar debt, and remove all US imperialist forces from Bolivia.

BARTLET
The imperialist forces their government expressly invited in.

KATE
Well, up to now they’ve been one of our most cooperative allies in the war on drugs.

TOBY
Since no one ever wins and it never ends, maybe we should stop calling it a war.

KATE
Fine. But we have 2000 troops and seven battleships in Latin America, and our pilots engage daily in hostile gunfire as they spray coca fields, but we don’t have to call it a war.

CJ
How about a low-grade conflict?

KATE
State feels we could tamp things down if you could just walk the ambassador’s statement back.

TOBY (writing)
‘The United States remains neutral in all free elections … and discourages any manner of external interference.’

BARTLET
I can probably keep a straight face through that. Is it enough?

KATE
You may want to specify with regard to Bolivia.

BARTLET
‘This means you, La Paz.’

KATE
So it’s reported in the Latin press.

BARTLET
The Latin press will just have to figure it out. What’s next?

CUT TO: INT. - OUTER OVAL OFFICE – DAY

LEO is waiting outside the Oval Office. DEBBIE is bustling about doing administrative things. A news report can be faintly heard on a TV in the background.

DEBBIE
You wouldn’t be more comfortable waiting in your office?

LEO
This is fine.

There is a pause as DEBBIE walks to her desk.

DEBBIE 
I’m sure you could go in and join them.

LEO
I’ll wait.

DEBBIE (sitting)
They should be done any minute. (pause) Can I get you some water or anything?

LEO
I’m good, Deb, I’m sure you’ve got things to worry about other than me.

DEBBIE
You never called me ‘Deb’ before.

LEO
No?

DEBBIE
President does, sometimes.

LEO
Mmm-ah.

DEBBIE
I actually – kind of hate it.

LEO
I’m sorry.

DEBBIE
It’s okay, you didn’t know.

LEO
Ever tell the President?

DEBBIE (standing and going across the room)
Hard to work it in. ‘Sir, the North Koreans just threatened to rain nuclear fire on Japan again, the NASDAQ is tanking, there’s a, a category four hurricane making landfall in the Keys and, oh, don’t call me Deb.’

LEO
You should tell him.

The door to the Oval Office opens and KATE steps out.

KATE
Oh, hey, Leo – uh, sorry about this morning.

LEO
It happens.

KATE
I got this Bolivia thing.

LEO
I understand.

KATE
Love to get your perspective on it.

LEO
Maybe after I’ve seen the President.

KATE
Maybe later.

LEO
Whenever.

KATE starts to leave, then stops and turns.

KATE
Uh, this afternoon?

LEO
Sure, if that’s good.

KATE
Yeah, yeah … (checking her Blackberry) 3:30?

LEO
See you then.

KATE
Looking forward to it.

KATE exits. LEO is left standing in the outer office. He notices a painting on the wall.

LEO
Was that Thomas Paine always there?

DEBBIE
I thought that was Nathan Hale, ‘I regret I only have but one life,’ et cetera, et cetera.

LEO
Paine. ‘These are the times that try men’s souls.’

DEBBIE
Get over yourself, Tom.

LEO continues to gaze at the portrait.

CUT TO: INT. - OVAL OFFICE – DAY

CJ and TOBY continue their meeting with BARTLET.

CJ
Ways and Means has some procedural issues with the Earned Income Tax Credit.

TOBY
But I think there’s movement.

BARTLET
Ten billion’s the goal, but it’s an election year. I’m realistic.

CJ
Overwhelming response to the State of the Union. Thirty-six interruptions for applause. 

BARTLET
Ah, I don’t know what’s more embarrassing – that we count them or that I care. 

CJ
Very impressive.

BARTLET (referring to TOBY)
I blame him.

TOBY
Wasn’t me.

CJ
He’s doing his annual sackcloth and ashes bit.

BARTLET
And I used to think it was a way of harvesting even more compliments, now I understand it’s just self-abnegation and clinical despair.

TOBY
Man understands me.

There’s a knock at the door and DEBBIE leans inside.

DEBBIE
Mr. President, uh, Leo McGarry is outside.

BARTLET
He’s been waiting all this time?

DEBBIE
Yes, and you’re late for your NSA briefing on Chechnya.

BARTLET
Okay, thanks guys -

CJ
Thank you, Mr. President.

BARTLET
- do the thing with the knocking again in five minutes.

DEBBIE 
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
Thanks, Deb.

LEO enters, squeezing past DEBBIE while giving her a meaningful look. TOBY and CJ are now gone.

BARTLET
Leo, have I said how great it is having you back?

LEO
A few times.

BARTLET
Oh. Sorry.

LEO
Everyone has. Not quite sure what you want me doing?

BARTLET
What you always did – make me smarter.

LEO
By comparison? Absolutely.

They both chuckle.

LEO
Oh, congratulations on last night.

BARTLET
I planned a morning resting on my laurels, but there’s this I-don’t-know-what in Bolivia. Courtland and his big yap.

LEO
Wonder why he said it.

BARTLET
He’s an idiot. He was always an idiot, why do you think we made him ambassador to Bolivia? What, why do you think he said it?

LEO
Have you given some thought to how I might make myself useful? I don’t want to undermine CJ -

There is a knock at the door and DEBBIE leans inside.

DEBBIE
Sorry to interrupt, Mr. President, but President Trenier is holding for you.

BARTLET (to LEO)
That’s something you can do, talk to the French.

LEO (standing to go)
No. Merci.

BARTLET
Sorry, I gotta take this.

LEO
Of course.

BARTLET
The day’s getting away from me, how about dinner tonight?

LEO
Be great.

BARTLET (picking up the phone)
I don’t care how many times I’ve said it; it’s a great thing you’re back.

LEO (turning to go)
See you tonight, Mr. President.

BARTLET (into phone)
Bonjour, Mr. President. Yes, I’m really looking forward to the G-8 in Paris.

CUT TO: INT. - COMMUNICATIONS BULLPEN – DAY

ANNABETH and CHARLIE are having a discussion.

ANNABETH
I know what it is, it just has a dull name.

CHARLIE (following ANNABETH into her office as CAROL also enters)
Earned Income Tax Credit. It’s the one government program that actually sounds like what it is.

ANNABETH
Exactly. D-U-L-L. (handing papers to CAROL) Oh, this goes to DNC and this one’s a blast fax.

CHARLIE
It was a highlight of the President’s address last night.

ANNABETH (making corrections on the second piece of paper)
By highlight you mean a chance for viewers to wonder whether they’re gonna have sex that night or, plan what they’re gonna wear in the morning -

CAROL (taking the second piece of paper)
Thank you, and you have -

ANNABETH
I know.

CAROL exits.

CHARLIE
It’s important. Thirty-six million Americans live below the poverty line, which is a million more than last year.

ANNABETH
Let’s shout that out from the rooftops, why don’t we?

CHARLIE
We blame the Republicans.

ANNABETH
Oh, there’s a fresh angle.

LARRY comes to the doorway holding a sheaf of papers.

LARRY
Charlie, you see the HUD Samaritan bill markup?

CHARLIE
Secretary spoke to the budget director this morning.

LARRY exits.

CHARLIE
No government program will do more to lift children out of poverty than the EITC.

ANNABETH
Oh, God, I thought the name was dull, the acronym’s worse. You’ve been working on this for two months and you can’t find a catchier handle? ‘Marriage penalty.’ ‘Death tax.’ Now, that you remember.

ANNABETH walks briskly out, joined by CAROL.

CUT TO: INT. - LEO’S OFFICE – DAY

The office is empty except for a chair, a small desk, a cart with a TV and VCR, and the whiteboard we saw earlier. LEO is reading as MARGARET comes in, carrying a large stack of VHS videotapes.

MARGARET
Leo!

LEO
Margaret.

MARGARET (looking around the room)
Who did this to you?

LEO
I got rid of everything.

MARGARET
Oh, I should have gone with the mahogany, I had a feeling -

LEO
I don’t want any clutter.

MARGARET (beat) 
It’s a look.

LEO (referring to the videotapes)
Are those the, um -

MARGARET
I’m still looking for the second inaugural.

She looks for a place to put the tapes down.

LEO
Floor’s good.

MARGARET
Really?

LEO
Mm-hmm.

MARGARET
Tower or pile?

LEO
Surprise me.

There’s a knock at the door and KATE appears.

KATE
Hey.

LEO
Hey.

KATE
I just found out, uh, eight US contractors are being held at gunpoint in Bolivia. Intel’s sketchy but it looks like it might be by Zalaya supporters.

LEO
Hmm. (to MARGARET, as she puts the tapes on the floor) Thanks for the tapes.

KATE
People are gathering down in the Sit Room if you want -

LEO
Oh, I’m sure you can all handle this. 

KATE stares at LEO.

LEO (to MARGARET)
Let me know if you find that second inaugural.

MARGARET
Sure.

MARGARET and KATE share a look.

KATE
I should -

LEO
Yeah. 

KATE walks away.

LEO (to MARGARET)
CJ’s probably looking for you.

MARGARET
Right.

LEO walks to the door as MARGARET backs out, and he shuts it. He goes through the pile of videotapes, selects one, puts it in the VCR, and starts to play it. We hear the voice of BARTLET from the tape.

BARTLET (VO)
- is an age of possibility, of great trials, but also tremendous opportunities. We need to set our nation on a new course, create a new history …

The camera pulls back outside LEO’s office, showing him through the window, watching the tape of an old BARTLET speech as the work of the West Wing goes on around him.

FADE OUT.
END ACT ONE.
* * *

ACT TWO

FADE IN: INT. - SITUATION ROOM – DAY

CJ, KATE, SECRETARY HUTCHINSON, CIA DIRECTOR ROLLIE, and other military officers around the table stand as BARTLET enters.

OFFICER
Ten-hut!

BARTLET
At ease. What’s the story?

KATE (as everyone takes their seats)
US contractors were ambushed and captured in the Chapare jungle.

BARTLET
How many?

KATE
Eight.

BARTLET
Alive?

CJ
As far as we know.

BARTLET
Captured by who?

KATE
They describe themselves as Zalaya supporters.

BARTLET
I have some enthusiastic supporters, they don’t go around holding people at gunpoint … much as I’d sometimes wish they would.

HUTCHINSON
These are paramilitaries, sir.

CJ
Run for President down there, you get your own private army?

HUTCHINSON
South America. If Bolivia wasn’t landlocked, he’d have his own navy, too.

KATE
They’re claiming the contractors are CIA, sent down to hijack the election.

BARTLET
Are they?

ROLLIE
No, sir.

CJ
What are they doing there?

HUTCHINSON
They’re private citizens.

BARTLET
Who happen to take camouflage gear with them on vacation?

KATE
They’re part of the coca eradication effort, sir.

ROLLIE
They work for the government.

CJ
The Bolivian government?

KATE
US government.

CJ
Sorry.

KATE
State has a $700 million contract with Tarmacorp, which employs them.

CJ
And they’re armed?

HUTCHINSON
Of course they’re armed, they’re spraying coca fields run by drug cartels.

BARTLET
I think what CJ’s driving at is the difference between what they call them and what we call them is more like dolphins and porpoises rather than lions and bats. What are the captors’ demands?

KATE
That’s just it. They haven’t made any.

HUTCHINSON
We think this may be an election stunt.

KATE
Zalaya got such a bounce from our ambassador’s statement, could be he figures a trumped-up US tampering charge puts him over the top.

BARTLET
Our guys were there spraying coca fields, we’re certain of that?

ROLLIE
Not necessarily themselves directly -

BARTLET
I know they may not attach the hose to the nozzle, but they were doing eradication work?

ROLLIE
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
They weren’t freelancing? Maybe doing some electoral strong-arming in their free time?

ROLLIE
There’s no evidence of that.

BARTLET
Make damn sure, would you, please? Our history down there is such that people are gonna find it a lot easier to believe Zalaya’s charges than our denials. It may not make a hell of a lot of difference, but when we call him a liar I’d prefer we be right.

KATE
Okay, next crisis – Korea. A three-foot hole has appeared in the DMZ fence.

CUT TO: INT. - HALLWAY – DAY

CJ comes around a corner and down a set of stairs as TOBY joins her and they both walk down the corridor.

TOBY
Intergovernmental Affairs needs to announce the Indian healthcare reauthorization.

CJ
It’s gonna get trumped by this Bolivia thing.

TOBY
Where are we on that?

CJ
Making certain our guys weren’t doing what Zalaya says they were.

TOBY
Then?

CJ
Liar, liar, pants on fire.

TOBY
It won’t rhyme in Spanish, don’t want you to be disappointed.

CJ
The President took another turn at whack-a-DCI.

TOBY
Guy’s gotta quit, doesn’t he?

CJ
God, I hope not, it’s too much fun. Besides, it’s the only person the President ever picks on. The CIA director goes, could be you or me, bucko.

TOBY
It’s already been me. Are we at all concerned about our checkered history down there: Allende, the CIA, and Che Guevara?

CJ
Yeah. We don’t have much credibility.

TOBY
You’ll talk to Intergovernmental Affairs?

CJ
In my spare time.

TOBY heads off in another direction as CJ approaches WILL.

CJ
Thank the VP for pitching in on State of the Union followthrough.

WILL
About that …

CJ
Will …

WILL
He’s out there, he’s shilling.

CJ
Shilling? You mean showing loyalty to an administration he happens to be serving in?

WILL
It’s the President’s agenda. I don’t recall burning much midnight oil discussing what’d help us in the primaries. He’ll do his bit this week because the President can’t, but after that, the campaign comes first.

CJ
On second thought, maybe don’t thank him so much.

CJ continues on into the Mural Room.

VOICE
Hello, Ms. Cregg.

CJ
Governor, everyone, sorry to keep you waiting.

VOICE 2
Hello, CJ.

CUT TO: INT. - ANNABETH’S OFFICE – DAY

TOBY stands outside ANNABETH’s door to talk to her, sitting at her desk with a phone to her ear.

TOBY
First Lady’s gonna be attending a stock car race.

ANNABETH (giving a thumbs up)
Hell, yeah!

TOBY
Excuse me?

ANNABETH
Colorful regional colloquialism betokening enthusiasm of a visceral-if-not-rowdy variety. (into phone) You’re making this too complicated.

TOBY
I want you to prep her.

ANNABETH
It’s a bunch of cars going real fast around an oval. There, I’m done. (into phone) It’s a food pyramid, not the human genome.

TOBY
There are fish-out-of-water concerns. This is your dream come true, Eliza Doolittle gets to tutor Henry Higgins.

ANNABETH
I’ll see if I can’t find my redneck-to-snob dictionary. (into phone) Here’s the message – eat less bread.

ANNABETH hangs up the phone.

TOBY
What, you’re offended?

ANNABETH
You’re implying I’m some kind of hayseed hillbilly hick?

TOBY
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply it. It was more of an emphatic assertion.

ANNABETH
Watch it, we rubes know how to throw down.

TOBY
Just teach her some terms - a vocabulary.

ANNABETH
Well, for starters, no one ‘attends’ a stock car race, you’re just goin’. Like as not, goin’ drunk.

TOBY
Good – but I don’t think Dr. Bartlet will be getting liquored up.

ANNABETH
Too bad. Otherwise, it gets kinda boring.

TOBY (sighs)
Teach her when to cheer. Stuff like that. Just make sure we avoid a flyover values disaster.

ANNABETH
Sorry?

TOBY
People in the middle of the country who you fly over when you’re trying to get to -

ANNABETH
Real cities? Can’t imagine why you’re worried about offending them.

CAROL appears in the doorway.

CAROL
The Labor Secretary?

ANNABETH grins at TOBY, staring at her. He then begins to chuckle as he walks out of the office.

TOBY 
Yeah, thanks.

CUT TO: INT. - LEO’S OFFICE – DAY

LEO continues to watch tapes of previous BARTLET speeches.

BARTLET (on tape)
Interdiction without intervention - eradication without education - leaves root causes to linger and fester, damning our most vigorous efforts -

As the camera moves around LEO, we see WILL standing in the doorway.

WILL
What are you watching?

LEO (turning off the tape)
State of the Union.

WILL
I don’t remember hearing that last night.

LEO
Second year.

WILL
Oh.

LEO
You need something?

WILL
Oh, just felt bad about running out on you this morning. Wanted to see if there was a time you could catch me up.

LEO
Whenever’s good.

WILL
This afternoon?

LEO
Mm-hmm.

WILL
Who should I coordinate the time with?

LEO
That’d be me.

WILL
Uh, okay. How’s 6:00?

LEO
That works.

WILL
I’ll be here.

LEO
I don’t mind going over, could stand the exercise.

WILL
Naw, I’ll come to you.

LEO
That’s fine.

WILL
See you then.

WILL walks away, then looks back through the windows as LEO restarts the tape of BARTLET’s speech.

BARTLET (on tape)
- cost to our national treasury, as well as our citizenry, trapped in a disease as insidious as it is neglected.

CUT TO: INT. - ROOSEVELT ROOM – DAY

TOBY and CHARLIE and some other staffers are meeting with Congressional Representatives, including SWARTHOUT, AUREN, and GLEESON.

TOBY
You’re bailing.

SWARTHOUT
We’re not bailing.

TOBY
The Earned Income Tax Credit is a Democratic issue!

AUREN
We can probably push it out of committee at $500 million.

TOBY
Great. The President called for $10 billion.

SWARTHOUT
That would be more.

CHARLIE
He got an applause break. From both sides of the aisle.

AUREN
That was last night. In the sober light of dawn, the Republicans are going to insist on added enforcements.

TOBY (taking a note from a staffer who just entered the room)
Why does their sobriety give me a hangover?

GLEESON
Fraud prevention, accounting measures -

CHARLIE
These are families at the bottom rung of the educational ladder. Adding paperwork is just going to confuse them.

TOBY (giving the note back)
Tell them I’ll be there in a few minutes.

GLEESON
It’s all right. We’re done.

TOBY
No, we’re not done and you’re not bailing.

AUREN
It’s a Republican Congress, and we have to be flexible.

TOBY
Why does no one ever come in here and say, ‘This is a Democratic White House, maybe we should start reflecting it?’!

SWARTHOUT
We don’t have the votes.

GLEESON
Day after the State of the Union, Presidents customarily go barnstorming to sell it. Don’t lecture us on how to wield this White House’s clout.

TOBY slams his notebook shut as the Congresspeople leave.

CUT TO: INT. - HALLWAY – DAY

CJ is walking down the corridor with TOBY and CHARLIE.

CJ
She really said that?

TOBY
If she wasn’t a woman, we might have had to throw down. (as CJ looks at him quizzically) Regional colloquialism.

CHARLIE
So what’s the next step?

TOBY
I’m not sure there is one.

CHARLIE
The EITC’s just dead?

CJ
No, no, Timmy, it’s at a nice farm out in the country where it can play with other dogs. How did last night turn into this morning?

TOBY
Bolivian blowup, bad employment numbers, a hole in the fence -

They enter CJ’s office to find everything rearranged, filing cabinets in the middle of the room, tables upended on other tables.

CJ
And now no furniture.

MARGARET enters. We then see LEO behind her, slowly making his way into CJ’s office.

MARGARET
The Majority Leader’s been in the Treaty Room since, well – he says since Tuesday, the NOAA Administrator called about the flood area in Hawaii. He’s setting up a conference call with FEMA and the Governor, and – you have a meeting with Leo.

LEO
If things are too wild, I can always find you later.

MARGARET (to TOBY)
Carol’s looking for you, something about the Labor Secretary threatening to quit.

TOBY exits.

MARGARET (to CJ)
You saw the new furniture?

CJ (to LEO)
Leo, I’m sorry, I’m afraid I’m gonna have to -

LEO
Sure. We’ll get to it.

CJ (to CHARLIE)
Majority Leader, natural disaster.

CJ and CHARLIE leave in different directions. MARGARET and LEO are left standing in the office.

MARGARET
Busy day.

LEO
Yeah.

MARGARET heads back to her desk. LEO looks around at the furniture pushed to the middle of the room.

CUT TO: INT. - WHITE HOUSE FOYER – DAY

WILL comes up to join TOBY as he walks through the foyer.

TOBY
One week.

WILL
Could we not do this?

TOBY
One week in support of the man who plucked him out of obscurity.

WILL
He was a widely known Congressman.

TOBY
As a joke. You and I made fun of him together.

WILL
You guys picked him. I wasn’t in that room.

TOBY
You think I was?

WILL
Then be mad at the President, or Leo, or whoever else was there! And pick a position – you can’t think he’s a complete joke and embarrassment and then be upset he’s not out there helping you more -

TOBY
Yes, I can.

WILL
Look – he’s supportive. He’ll continue to be.

TOBY
If it’s in his interest.

WILL
Oh, I’m sorry, have the rules of politics been suspended this year?

TOBY
The rules of politics should be suspended any chance we get. It’s disloyalty!

WILL
The Vice President has been nothing but steadfast.

TOBY
I wasn’t talking about him.

TOBY walks away.

CUT TO: INT. - LEO’S OFFICE – DAY

LEO continues to sort through the stack of videotapes. CHARLIE comes in the door.

CHARLIE
Hey, Leo.

LEO
Hey.

CHARLIE
Whatcha watching?

LEO
Old State of the Unions.

CHARLIE
What for?

LEO
Just curious. How you doing?

CHARLIE
A little whiplashed. Last night was such a high.

LEO
There as a staffer, sitting at the adult table -

CHARLIE
Watched it at home. My sister threw me a party ‘cause I got a line in the speech.

LEO
Which one?

CHARLIE
‘We must help those working hardest to help themselves.’

LEO
I see your fingerprints all over it.

CHARLIE
Only EITC’s already in trouble.

LEO
The whiplash.

CHARLIE
Yeah.

LEO
House Dems?

CHARLIE
They’re defeatist. And Annabeth doesn’t like its name.

LEO
She’s not wrong. I don’t get excited when I hear EITC, do you?

CHARLIE
Maybe if it had a more memorable name, it’d be easier to fight for? I think if we could define it more clearly as a tax cut – so a vote against it is seen as raising taxes on the working poor.

LEO looks at CHARLIE steadily as CHARLIE thinks.

CHARLIE
I don’t see how you easily oppose it.

LEO continues to look at CHARLIE.

CUT TO: INT. - COMMUNICATIONS BULLPEN – DAY

TOBY comes into the bullpen as CAROL and others are watching an interview on the TV. We hear the voice of a woman, MRS. CREASY, being interviewed.

MRS. CREASY (VO, on TV)
I had just dropped off my kids at school. Thank God, because I don’t know what to tell them …

TOBY (looking up at the TV)
Who’s - ?

CAROL
Contractor’s wife.

Now we see MRS. CREASY on the screen.

MRS. CREASY (on TV)
… they said, call my Congressman, I, I called him, he said call the State Department. No one is, taking responsibility.

ANNABETH (shouting from her office)
Toby!

TOBY (turning to go into ANNABETH’s office)
Yeah …

MRS. CREASY (on TV)
My husband is, is an engineer. Not a soldier.

FADE OUT.
END ACT TWO.
* * *

ACT THREE

FADE IN: INT. - OUTER OVAL OFFICE – DAY

CJ walks towards the Oval Office door, speaking to DEBBIE as she passes by her desk.

CJ
Hi. I need a few minutes with the President.

DEBBIE
Not in there.

CJ (stopping)
Oh. I don’t have anything.

DEBBIE
He’s in the residence.

CJ
Oh. Okay.

CJ starts for the door to the portico.

DEBBIE
Napping.

CJ stops again.

DEBBIE
Not to be disturbed unless there’s an emergency.

CJ
It wasn’t on my schedule.

DEBBIE
Or mine.

CJ
Will you let me know when he comes back down?

DEBBIE (looking up at CJ wryly)
My first call.

CJ exits.

CUT TO: INT. - MURAL ROOM – DAY

ABBEY is in the Mural Room with some of her staff. ANNABETH appears at the door.

ABBEY
Oh … are you the one who’s gonna teach me proper speedway decorum?

ANNABETH
How to win friends and influence yokels, yes, ma’am.

ABBEY
Ah – now, if I’d made a crack like that you’d think me a terrible snob.

ANNABETH
What did you turn down to make room for Martinsville?

ABBEY
NIH symposium on molecular structures and bioimaging. Not a lot of NASCAR crossover.

ANNABETH
Let’s start with the dress code. Jeans, T-shirt – oh, and can you borrow the President’s leather flight jacket?

ABBEY
You don’t find that a tad inappropriate?

ANNABETH
Well, there’ll be women there in bikinis on lounge chairs in the RV park, inappropriate’s still a ways off.

ABBEY
Ah.

ANNABETH
I’ve given this a lot of thought, and I know something that we can bond over so far as stock cars are concerned.

ABBEY
And that would be?

ANNABETH
We’re both women.

ABBEY
Okay.

ANNABETH
Women make up 45 percent of the audience for NASCAR events, more than any other major league sport.

ABBEY
Huh, I wonder why.

ANNABETH
Well, everyone has their theories, but I’m gonna tell you plain. It’s the drivers.

ABBEY
Huh.

ANNABETH
They’re a bunch of studs.

ABBEY
Mm-hmm.

ANNABETH
Well-built hotties running around in tight-fitting fire suits.

ABBEY
Hotties.

ANNABETH
Hotsy-tot Hottentot hotties – ma’am.

ABBEY (chuckling)
Well – that’s all very well and good, but I don’t -

ANNABETH slaps a photo of NASCAR driver Casey Mears on the table next to ABBEY.

ABBEY (admiring the photo)
Ooh, my.

ANNABETH
He’ll be there. (putting down a photo of Jeff Gordon) And him … oh, and this one …

ANNABETH adds a photo of Jamie McMurray to the pile.

ABBEY
The one with the eyes?

ANNABETH
One of the favorites.

ABBEY
I would imagine.

CUT TO: INT. - CJ’S OFFICE – DAY

CJ is trying to work with CHARLIE on the sofa of her office, still in disarray with furniture piled up everywhere. TOBY and KATE enter.

CJ
You see the contractor’s wife?

TOBY
Yeah.

CJ
You’re gonna have to brief.

TOBY
These guys … absolutely, positively not CIA?

KATE
Definitely, definitively not.

CJ
Don’t lean on that, Toby.

KATE
Why?

CJ
They’re US-paid mercenaries, former military, most of them, Special Ops, SEALs, Marines -

TOBY
We’re in distinction-without-a-difference land.

CJ
Little bit.

KATE
I don’t see it that way.

CJ
It’s not your job to. They weren’t doing what they’ve been accused of, that’s our statement. And I’m late.

CJ gets up to leave, with KATE also walking out. CHARLIE starts out the door when TOBY stops him.

TOBY
Anyone talk to Leo?

CHARLIE
He’s in his office watching State of the Unions.

TOBY
Unions?

CHARLIE
Old ones.

CHARLIE leaves.

CUT TO: INT. - LEO’S OFFICE – DAY

LEO is putting a light bulb into  a lamp. KATE appears in the doorway, and knocks on the frame.

LEO
Yeah …

KATE
We said 3:30?

LEO
We did.

KATE (slowly entering)
So …

LEO continues making some notes on the desk.

KATE
What’s your day been like?

LEO
It’s quiet. Yours?

KATE
Not quiet.

LEO
Bolivia.

KATE
Yeah. Korea. Things down in Burundi …

LEO
What?

KATE
Oh, just … these contractors operate under such – vague guidelines just because that’s the way everyone wants it. And there’s no congressional oversight, no controls, and a whole lot of money changing hands.

LEO
You know these guys?

KATE
Not these, but … yeah, I know these guys. And it’s not just that it’s, futile, you know, I mean, as long as Americans are willing to pay $60 a gram for cocaine, some peasant farmer earning $60 a year is gonna grow it. But it’s just, so geopolitically counterproductive. We turn their villages into war zones, we destroy their land, we poison their families with herbicides and then we’re all surprised when they go vote for the Socialist.

KATE takes a big breath.

KATE
Uh, sorry … it’s a, um … crappy day.

LEO looks steadily at KATE.

KATE
It’s my annivorcery.

LEO
Um - anni–what?

KATE (as her pager goes off and she looks at it)
Annivorce. It’s the anniversary of my divorce.

LEO
Didn’t know you’d been married.

KATE
Couple times.

LEO
Hopeless romantic.

KATE
Hopeless, anyway. (chuckles uneasily) You?

LEO (holding up a finger)
Yeah.

KATE
Uh, what did you want to talk about?

The INTERN appears in the doorway.

INTERN
Sorry – Uh, Ms. Harper, they need you in the Situation Room.

KATE (sighing, to LEO)
Maybe later?

KATE walks away.

CUT TO: INT. - OVAL OFFICE – DAY

BARTLET comes walking in from the portico.

BARTLET
Debbie!

DEBBIE (entering from the outer office)
That wasn’t very long.

BARTLET
I couldn’t sleep.

DEBBIE
Couldn’t or wouldn’t?

BARTLET
I have three daughters and a wife, two of whom are also doctors – if you presume I don’t get enough of that sort of comment, you’re really not using your imagination.

DEBBIE
Naps are restorative. Churchill took them.

BARTLET
Churchill also maintained a 24-hour buzz. These days, people who drink that much during the day are encouraged to attend meetings.

DEBBIE
An individual perhaps more for veneration than emulation.

BARTLET
And I don’t know where all this restorative nonsense comes from. Every nap I’ve ever taken in my life has left me feeling groggy and on edge.

DEBBIE
I hadn’t noticed. The NSA called, Secretary of State, NSA again, saying talk to her before talking to the Secretary of State -

CUT TO: INT. - ANNABETH’S OFFICE – DAY

CHARLIE comes in the door.

CHARLIE
You’re right.

ANNABETH
About so much. To which specific or category of things are you presently referring?

CHARLIE
The Earned Income Tax Credit needs a better name.

ANNABETH
To brand it.

CHARLIE
Not just something zippier or catchier.

ANNABETH
Something to help you fight for it.

CHARLIE
To make it harder to fight against it.

CAROL appears in the doorway.

CAROL
Deputy Secretary Morrison again.

As CAROL departs ANNABETH sighs deeply.

ANNABETH
Workfare’s taken. Work Aid?

CHARLIE
Sounds like a handout. Employment Incentive.

ANNABETH
Oh, no, no, that’s terrible. Work Tax.

CHARLIE
It’s all a work tax. Poverty Tax.

ANNABETH
Mmm, that’s closer.

CHARLIE
Poor Tax. It’s simple, direct …

ANNABETH
Poor Tax. It’s good.

CAROL shows up again in the doorway.

CAROL
You want me to say you’ll call her back?

ANNABETH
No, I’ll be right there.

CHARLIE
Hard to argue on the floor of Congress to institute a Poor Tax.

ANNABETH
Yeah.

CHARLIE (smiling, turning to go)
Thanks.

ANNABETH (punching a button on the phone and picking up the receiver)
This is Annabeth.

CUT TO: INT. - LEO’S OFFICE – EVENING

LEO closes some blinds, making the room darker. TOBY walks in.

TOBY
Hey.

LEO
Hey.

TOBY
Sorry about this morning.

LEO
Oh, it happens.

TOBY
Heard you were watching old State of the Unions.

LEO
Heh, and inaugurals.

TOBY
Something wrong with this year’s speech?

LEO
What do you think?

TOBY
I wrote it.

LEO
You seemed remarkably uncomfortable accepting praise, even for you.

TOBY
What are you doing here, Leo? Watching old speeches and – reading about the founding fathers? We don’t have time for you to sit around like a garden Buddha parsing out fortune cookie wisdom, we’re getting buried alive here. (chuckling) Get up and grab a shovel.

LEO (picking up some notes)
‘While the assault weapons ban may have ended, the debate has not, and I will fight this Congress as long as the -’

TOBY
‘- as long as the senseless, needless violence continues.’ Second Inaugural.

LEO (reading again)
‘The promise of stem cell research has again been delayed by congressional ban. Imagine a child paralyzed by a spinal cord injury -’

TOBY
‘ - spinal cord injury, watching, waiting, knowing that politics is the obstacle to a cure.’ Third State of the Union, I know what we said. We all know what we said.

LEO
Last night’s State of the Union, you pulled your punches.

There is a pause.

TOBY
It was well-received.

LEO
It’s easy to applaud for something that no one’s gonna make you stand up and pass. (reading again) ‘By any measure, we’re losing the war on drugs. Demand is exactly the same, supply is the -’

TOBY
‘ - supply is the same, but prices have gone down.’

LEO
‘It’s time for a comprehensive new approach to this nation’s dependence on drugs.’ That was in your rough draft of last night’s speech.

TOBY
I cut it.

LEO
Who told you to?

TOBY
Nobody, nobody had to. You’ve had a heart attack and he can’t stand up! Day after every other State of the Union the President launches a month-long road show to stump for what was in it! (TOBY’s pager goes off) This year I get Bingo Bob, and a week.

TOBY walks out as LEO watches him go.

FADE OUT.
END ACT THREE.
* * *

ACT FOUR

FADE IN: INT. - SITUATION ROOM – DAY

The door opens and BARTLET enters.

OFFICER 
Ten-hut!

BARTLET (walking to the front of the room)
Let’s see it.

A video of one of the captured contractors, JONATHAN CREASY, is seen on the screen.

CREASY (on TV)
My name is Jonathan Creasy. I’m a private American citizen working for Tarmacorp, under a contract with the US government. I’m being held with seven Americans. We will be released subject to completion of a fair and free election of the Bolivian Presidential contest.

CJ
Fair and free translating to a Zalaya victory.

BARTLET
‘A private citizen under contract with the US government.’ Cognitive dissonance, anyone? (to HUTCHINSON) Where are we on this?

HUTCHINSON
A P-3 off the Misawa. PACCOM is coordinating the search.

CJ
Anything?

HUTCHINSON
No.

BARTLET
It’s a jungle out there. And the Bolivian government?

KATE
Rock and a hard place. They want to help their good friend the US, but are terrified of looking like they were helping in case Zalaya wins.

BARTLET
They don’t want to be up here in two week’s time seeking political asylum.

CJ
We find them, who mounts a rescue if not the Bolivians? Tarmacorp, us?

HUTCHINSON
Not us.

KATE
Tarmacorp’s flying Vietnam-era Hueys, they go down we end up with more contractors to find and rescue.

HUTCHINSON
They’re not US troops.

KATE
Why, because we pay them through a middleman?

HUTCHINSON
Nobody forced them to go down there.

KATE
Well, maybe you’ll get to explain that to their widows.

BARTLET
When’s the election?

CJ
Ten days.

BARTLET (beat)
Do we believe that Zalaya will release them?

KATE
If he wins.

BARTLET
And if he doesn’t?

CUT TO: INT. - HALLWAY – DAY

CJ and KATE have left the Situation Room and are walking in the corridor.

CJ
Will we find them?

KATE
A jungle, they know the best hiding places. We’ll need a tip.

CJ
These are tough guys. They gonna hold out to the election?

KATE
Well, you saw the video. When you’re being held, ten days is a long time.

CJ
Have you ever been held?

KATE
I’ve held other people. Twenty-four hours is a long time.

CUT TO: INT. - OUTSIDE LEO’S OFFICE – EVENING

WILL walks through the bullpen and up to LEO’s doorway. We see footage of MRS. CREASY’s interview playing on the TV news. LEO is sitting in his chair looking out the window. WILL knocks on the door.

LEO
Yeah? (turning to see it’s WILL) Oh, is it 6 o’clock already?

WILL
I can come back.

LEO
No, no, come in, come in. How you doing?

WILL
Oh, you know – have to head back to New Hampshire tomorrow afternoon. We’re up ten points in the polls. (beat) Getting tired of people treating me like I’ve sold my soul to the devil.

LEO
You think you have?

WILL
Well, I don’t think the VP’s the devil. And I don’t think I’ve sold my soul. I may have rented it out for a bit.

LEO
Why do you say that?

WILL
Well, I was mostly joking. I, I don’t think he’s the devil. I don’t know what I think of him, really.

LEO
Catalogue his qualities.

WILL
The negative ones everyone knows … and never ceases delighting in reminding me about.

LEO
His other qualities?

WILL
He’s … plain-spoken. He’s clear and direct. Doesn’t have a, multitrack mind like the President, but that’s not always a bad thing. The truth is, and I’m not sure I ever even realized this before now – I’ve spent the last year and a half looking for what you saw in him … you and the President, when you gave him this job. You picked Russell, him, to serve as VP to a President with a serious health condition. You were aware you were picking a potential successor. On some level, I’ve just trusted that, and assumed I’d eventually discover what you knew then. 

LEO
Have you?

WILL
Tell me what it was, we’ll compare notes. (LEO turns away) I know, doesn’t work like that. He’s my guy, I have to figure him out on my own.

CAROL knocks at the door.

CAROL
Sorry to interrupt, but you’ve got to see the First Lady.

CAROL leads LEO and WILL out to the Communications bullpen, where they’re joined by TOBY and ANNABETH and other staffers, all watching ABBEY at the NASCAR race on TV (MSNBC, to be exact).

TOBY
Let’s see it.

REPORTER (on TV, amid cheering)
… make her way out Victory Lane to congratulate McMurray, who is ecstatic after dominating here at Martinsville Speedway. Not sure if she’s ready to join the pit crew just yet.

On the TV, we see driver Jamie McMurray give ABBEY a kiss on the cheek and then a bear hug.

REPORTER (on TV)
There’s the kiss, ceremonial victory kiss … oops, caught her a bit by surprise there -

ANNABETH (to TOBY)
Such a good sport – to take one like that for the flyover states.

TOBY
Did you brief her, about the kiss?

ANNABETH
They loved it.

CAROL appears in front of TOBY and ANNABETH.

CAROL
The First Lady, for both of you.

ANNABETH
Who gets pissed about kissing a NASCAR driver?

TOBY (turning to leave with ANNABETH)
Another hour of my life gone.

CUT TO: INT. - CJ’S OFFICE – EVENING

CJ is on the phone. LEO appears behind her. The office has finally been reorganized and CJ has her desk again.

CJ (on phone)
Of course we want to avert a disaster in South Dakota, but I can’t take this to the President just yet. (beat) No. (beat) Thank you, Governor.

CJ hangs up.

LEO
Trouble in South Dakota?

CJ
In about a thousand years. Mount Rushmore’s on the move.

LEO
How far has it gone so far?

CJ
About an inch.

LEO looks around the office.

CJ
I hope you don’t mind.

LEO
Looks great. Nobody ever thought to put fresh-cut flowers on my desk, despite 18 acres of gardens outside. 

MARGARET (stepping in)
Majority Leader.

LEO
Oh, you should take that.

CJ (considering; to MARGARET)
I’ll call him back.

MARGARET nods and exits. CJ stands up and goes to LEO.

CJ
I could’ve used you in the Sit Room today.

LEO
I heard you had it under control.

CJ
Mmm, didn’t feel like it.

LEO
Never does.

They sit around the coffee table.

LEO
You’re doing great.

MARGARET (stepping in)
The President’s in the residence.

CJ
Does he want me to - ?

LEO
Oh, no, I’m sorry, that’s for me. (to MARGARET) Let him know I’m coming right up. (to CJ) We’re having dinner. Probably should have run that by the Chief of Staff.

CJ
Oh, Chief of Staff has enough on her plate. I’m sorry we didn’t get to talk today. We’ll find time tomorrow.

LEO (standing)
Sure.

LEO starts out, then stops by the door.

LEO
It was easier, for me. You as my Press Secretary, Sam, Josh, Toby -

CJ
Toby?

LEO
Toby’s always been Toby. Still took me a year to figure out what the hell I was doing, and those were the easy years.

CJ
We had easy years?

LEO
Easier than this.

LEO exits. CJ thinks a moment.

CJ
Margaret? What’s next?

CUT TO: INT. - WHITE HOUSE RESIDENCE – NIGHT

BARTLET and LEO are having dinner.

BARTLET (chewing)
How’s yours?

LEO (with disdain)
This heart-healthy stuff, I have to keep reminding myself it’s good for me.

BARTLET
At least it resembles actual food. Abbey’s got me on this macrobiotic diet.

LEO
That does look a little grim.

BARTLET
What I wouldn’t give for a burger and fries.

LEO
A cream sauce. I’d like to have the occasional light cream sauce without everyone reacting like it’s a suicide attempt.

BARTLET (checking the door)
So, tonight, Abbey’s out of town. We can turn the residence into a fort and sword fight with empty paper towel rolls.

They both laugh as BARTLET stands up and pours himself coffee.

LEO
So you feel pretty good about last night’s State of the Union?

BARTLET
According to at least six op-eds, I set an ambitious national agenda.

LEO
Is that what you think?

BARTLET (beat)
You have a chance to figure out what you’d like to do around here?

LEO
Have you?

BARTLET
Don’t do this, Leo, not the day after the State of the Union.

LEO (standing)
Everyone’s walking around here like we’re finished! We got 365 more days!

BARTLET
It’s year eight, it’s a Republican Congress, and I’m hemorrhaging staff.

LEO
Four years ago we announced a blue ribbon commission on entitlements. Why wasn’t it mentioned? Two years ago, you announced a commitment to stem cell research.

BARTLET
The legislation died in Congress, Leo, you held the wake!

LEO
What happened to the drug treatment policy last night?

BARTLET
We had to narrow our focus -

LEO
Now’s the time to widen, not narrow focus – what are you saving your political capital for?

BARTLET
I have a responsibility to the party -

LEO
You have a responsibility to the country, sir.

BARTLET sets down his coffee and stalks away.

LEO
The American people sent you here for two terms. (pause) Eight years. (beat) So the last one’s gonna be harder. I’ve never known you to shy away from a fight.

BARTLET
And I’ve never had to make a speech based on the maximum amount of time I could stand up.

BARTLET sits, moodily considering. LEO slowly walks to him.

LEO
Those excuses I kept hearing all day? Nobody mentioned MS. Two-hundred and seventy-two words. That’s all Lincoln said at the Gettysburg Address, it took four minutes – and set the tone for the next century. You wanted to talk about what I could do here … it’s this.

BARTLET
Said the man with the double bypass.

LEO sits.

LEO
The both of us, sir, this is our last game. Let’s leave it all out on the field.

CUT TO: INT. - WHITE HOUSE ENTRANCE – NIGHT

9:57 PM

TOBY and CHARLIE are signing in at the guard desk. They walk through the hallway.

TOBY
You know why we got called in?

CHARLIE
No idea.

TOBY
Well, I almost got to eat dinner.

KATE comes up behind them.

KATE
You want to hear something depressing? This disrupts my evening not one bit.

ANNABETH and WILL join the group as they continue toward the Oval Office.

ANNABETH
Ten o’clock? I had a date.

WILL
You had a date tonight?

ANNABETH
Oh, I always have a date.

CUT TO: INT. - OVAL OFFICE – NIGHT

The group steps into the Oval Office to find CJ waiting for them.

CJ
Welcome back. Sorry about the hour.

TOBY
What’s going on?

CJ
The President should be down in a minute.

The door to the portico opens and BARTLET steps in.

BARTLET
Everybody here?

CJ
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
Follow me.

BARTLET leads the group out of the Oval Office, through the outer office.

ANNABETH
What’s this all about?

KATE
Stock market crash in Guyana, perhaps.

WILL
And me with all my money in sapodilla futures.

The group continues past the Roosevelt Room, where a custodian is cleaning the table.

CUT TO: INT. - LEO’S OFFICE – NIGHT

LEO is arranging the videotapes onto the shelves, cleaning up the formerly cluttered office space. There are chairs arranged in a semicircle as LEO stands next to his whiteboard, with ‘365’ still written on it. The group, led by BARTLET, steps inside.

LEO
Hey.

Several respond with ‘Hey’ and ‘Hi, Leo.’

LEO
Welcome.

BARTLET
Thank you all for coming back in on a school night. I had dinner with an old friend tonight. I thought everyone should hear what he had to say.

LEO
I want to read you something.

He puts on his glasses and picks up some papers from his desk.

LEO
‘The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly; ‘tis dearness only that gives everything its value.’

CHARLIE (to TOBY)
You?

WILL
Thomas Paine.

TOBY
He said ‘tis … might have been a clue.

LEO
Busy day around here today. (to KATE) What’d you spend it on?

KATE
Uh, Bolivia.

LEO
Well, no, you spent it on a situation in Bolivia, a crisis. I understand that gravitational pull. North Korea pokes a hole in the fence, it gets your attention. As do whiny Cabinet members, floods, and new employment figures. Pretty soon it’s the whole day. Problem is, we’re running out of them.

LEO turns to the whiteboard, erases the ‘5’ and then writes ‘364 days.’ He circles it.

LEO
That’s how much time we have left. We have the ability to effect more change in a day at the White House than we’ll have in a lifetime once we walk out these doors. What do you want to do with them?

There is a pause as everyone takes in what LEO has said.

CJ
We should finally get serious about health care – whether it calls attention to the President’s MS or not.

LEO begins writing notes on the whiteboard.

KATE
A new approach to Latin America.

TOBY
A real commitment to drug treatment.

LEO
What else?

WILL
The Vice President and I think it’s time to talk about race in this country.

LEO
He’s right.

CHARLIE
I’ve got some ideas on how to increase opportunity for the working poor.

ANNABETH
We both do.

CJ
Talking about repackaging the EITC.

ANNABETH
Poor Tax.

WILL
Catchy.

TOBY
Comprehensive planning -

CHARLIE
That includes training, education, urban development -

KATE
Assault weapons ban -

CJ
Affordable housing -

WILL
HR 190 is going to shift the debate back to segregation -

The screen fades to black as the conversation continues.

ANNABETH
Isn’t that what you wanted?

WILL
Yeah. A resurgence in civil rights activism couldn’t hurt anyone ...

DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES.
FADE TO BLACK.
THE END.
* * *

The West Wing and all its characters are properties of Aaron Sorkin, John Wells Productions, Warner Brothers Television, and NBC. No copyright infringement is intended.

The West Wing Transcript
Episode 6x12 – 365 Days
Original Airdate: January 19, 2005

THE WEST WING TRANSCRIPT: Opposition Research (S6E11)

THE WEST WING
6X11 - “OPPOSITION RESEARCH”
WRITTEN BY ELI ATTIE
DIRECTED BY CHRISTOPHER MISIANO

Transcribed by Walking, Talking, And Yelling At Clouds
(kegofglory.blogspot.com)

TEASER

OPPOSITION RESEARCH

FADE IN: EXT. - SNOWY ROADSIDE – DAY

An SUV is approaching the camera on the road. We can hear the sound of a radio announcer as it approaches.

ANNOUNCER (VO)
… in the southern half of the state today’s early morning mix of freezing rain and sleet will ease up by early afternoon when temperatures will rise …

We hear MATT SANTOS, and as the SUV turns onto a side road, we are taken inside the vehicle. MATT is driving and JOSH is in the passenger seat, holding a map.

MATT (VO)
I want this to be a campaign of ideas. 

JOSH (VO)
I think you missed a turn.

MATT
Entitlements are collapsing, our school system’s a joke, you could sneak a fleet of tanks across the Canadian border, and these campaigns always wind up being about a candidate’s high school transcripts.

JOSH
It was a left at Horseshoe Lake.

MATT
I thought it was a bend at Horseshoe Lake.

JOSH
A left, a bend, I, I think you missed it.

MATT
You know, if we just took the money the campaigns spent on personality contests and partisan sideshows, we could solve this country’s problems and shut down talk radio, all at the same time.

JOSH
First Amendment issues aside, that – see, this looks more like a curve, unless this is just bad cartography.

MATT
You know, I almost wish that we could have a campaign slogan without my name in it.

JOSH
Yeah, ‘For President.’ It’s catchy. Probably cut both ways.

MATT
I’m not seeing a curve here anyway, uh – why is our headquarters so far out of the way?

JOSH
Well, it’s New Hampshire. There’s not a whole lot that’s in the way.

MATT (taking the map from JOSH)
Let me see. How about a kick-off speech on education?

JOSH
The problem with education is it’s stuck in the muck. (pointing) Here, isn’t that the …?

MATT
Looks more like a slope than a curve. (giving the map back to JOSH) All right …

JOSH
You got teachers’ unions blocking any change in hiring structure, you got local school districts ready to burn coloring books if Washington dictates what color crayon … New Hampshire’s about retail politics, person-to-person. People here won’t vote for you until you’ve had coffee in their house five times.

MATT
I hope they’re serving decaf.

The SUV has arrived in a town, heading down the road to a main business district. We hear the song ‘Someday, Someway’ by Marshall Crenshaw on the car’s radio. As the car reaches the business district, MATT makes a u-turn and parks in front of a store building, with a giant ‘FOR LEASE’ sign in the window. MATT and JOSH get out of the car, looking at a piece of cardboard taped over the front door with ‘MATT SANTOS FOR PRESIDENT’ written on it in colored marker. 

MATT
Guess we’re using my name after all.

MATT and JOSH walk into the building. We see it was formerly a sporting goods store, with tents, kayaks, and lifesaving rings strewn about. As they come through the door, we can hear MATT’s staffers from his DC office, NED and RONNA, talking back in the makeshift offices.

NED
We got room. (laughing, then as he sees MATT and JOSH) Welcome, Matt!

RONNA
Hi, Matt!

MATT (walking up to them)
Hey. Josh, you know Ronna and Ned from my congressional staff?

JOSH
Yeah, we’ve been talking on the phone. (shaking hands) Hi.

RONNA
I’ve never picked out a campaign headquarters before.

JOSH
Got a ceiling and everything.

MATT
Yeah, if you like that sort of thing.

JOSH
Yeah, when our fundraising kicks in, we’re gonna need more phone lines, more desks, maybe some industrial safety helmets, but, uh, for now just make sure we meet the fire code.

NED (to MATT)
You were right, Germany’s at 240, Japan’s at 243.

MATT
Ah …

JOSH
243?

NED
Days in the school year.

JOSH
And we’re counting because … ?

MATT
I was asking Ned to look into, uh, lengthening the school year from 180 days to 240. There’s a professor over at Boston College, he’s done a lot of work on this. I thought we might have him come over here with a few thinkers and get us some ideas for an education speech.

JOSH
And we will, but … let’s not put the cart before the carcass here. This trip is about introducing yourself, honing a narrative. That’s it.

MATT
I’m here to hone.

JOSH (to RONNA)
You say this had been a sporting goods store?

RONNA
Um, a kind of specialty sporting goods. 

JOSH sees a sign and a pile of life rafts.

JOSH (reading the sign)
‘Laraby’s Life Savers – Lose Your Boat, We’ll Help You Float.’

RONNA
The first month’s free.

JOSH
When the press finds out we’re launching this thing from the hull of the Titanic -

RONNA
Yeah, I bet we get a break on flood insurance.

JOSH
Okay, lose the flotillas, anyone asks, (pointing to the ceiling) we’re working on a skylight. Congressman, we better get going to our first event. We got a full day ahead of us.

MATT (pouring coffee)
Ah, hang on a minute, hang on a minute. You know, they say democracy is, uh, how we choose the guy who gets the blame. Well, I will take the blame, but I will never forget those of you who deserve the credit.

MATT hands cups of coffee to NED and RONNA, then another to JOSH as he takes one himself.

MATT
Thank you for being with me here at the, uh, start of this crazy roller-coaster ride.

The four toast with the styrofoam cups of coffee.

MATT
Okay. Let’s go make us some history.

CUT TO: EXT. - LITCHFIELD TOWN DUMP – DAY

The SUV pulls up to a parking area across from the dump, where people are tossing bags of trash into a dumpster. MATT and JOSH get out of the car, taking in the cold air.

MATT
Oh, this is just a bit too metaphorical for me.

JOSH
All the candidates do it. It’s an exercise in humility.

MATT
I could give a major address on the importance of triple-ply.

JOSH
How about shaking some hands, helping the people with their recycling?

MATT sniffs, and starts to cross the road. 

MATT
Anything particular I should say?

JOSH
Just tell ‘em who you are, what you’re doing.

JOSH takes MATT’s gloves, and MATT heads across the road, greeting a man walking away from the dumpster.

MATT
Morning! Hi, I’m Matt Santos, I’m running for President.

JOSH watches with a satisfied smile.

SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES.
END TEASER.
***

ACT ONE

FADE IN: EXT. - LITCHFIELD TOWN DUMP – DAY

A woman is taking a garbage bag out of the back of her minivan. MATT rushes up to greet her.

MATT
Morning, ma’am. Matt Santos, I’m running for President. May I help you with that?

MATT takes the garbage bag and throws it into the dumpster. He holds out his hand to shake with the woman, then stops and gives a wave after he realizes where the hand has just been. We see JOSH and RONNA across the street, sitting in the open tailgate of the SUV. Another campaign VOLUNTEER is standing and waiting next to his minivan.

JOSH
Tell me about this education stuff he wants to do.

RONNA
Uh, Ned’s working on that. He asked me to work on a, national service program and some ideas for Medicare reform. He’s thinking about a series of speeches, starting tomorrow night at Hawk’s house.

JOSH
We’re not gonna do that.

RONNA
We’re not?

JOSH
I’m just getting to know this guy. Uh … I don’t want to come on too strong with, uh – you gotta help me out here.

RONNA
You want the memos?

JOSH
I want to rein in the policy process. 

RONNA (with a chuckle)
You can’t.

JOSH
What part of campaign manager do you not understand? Do you want me to draw you a flow chart? (chuckling)

RONNA
Where’s Matt on this chart?

JOSH
Let’s call him the Congressman.

RONNA
Well, he likes to be called Matt, and he runs his own policy process.

JOSH
Matt is a guy who hosts home improvement shows. The Congressman is a guy who runs for President, and you don’t give policy speeches in New Hampshire – the world’s capital of grip-and-grin – especially, before people can pick you out of a lineup.

RONNA
In the House, when we were dragging our feet on a policy he liked, he would just announce it without telling us.

JOSH
Great. (beat) I got to meet with some state legislators. Keep him here till CNN arrives, I pulled some strings to get us some b-roll.

JOSH starts for the minivan.

JOSH
Don’t let him change the official language to Flemish while I’m gone. (to the VOLUNTEER) Let’s go.

CUT back to the dump. A man leaves a bag of trash in a dumpster as MATT speaks to him.

MATT
Morning.

MAN
Hey. Hey, aren’t you that new candidate from Texas?

They shake hands.

MATT
Yes, sir, Matt Santos, uh, great to meet you. 

MAN
Do you know Phil Herlihy, lives right there in Sierra Vista?

MATT
Oh, no, that’s Arizona. Uh, Sierra Blanca – that’s in Texas.

MAN
Oh. Well … he’s a good guy.

The MAN walks off as MATT stands there, a bit flummoxed.

CUT TO: EXT. - TOWN STREET – DAY

The minivan driven by the VOLUNTEER heads down the street. We hear JOSH talking to TOBY on the phone.

JOSH (into phone)
No, he’s great, he’s got a million ideas, he’s really engaged.

TOBY (on phone)
Hoynes is up by eight in the South Carolina poll.

JOSH (into phone)
That’s all name ID, mile wide and an inch deep.

We see TOBY at his desk, on the phone.

TOBY (into phone)
How’s your staff?

JOSH (on phone)
I got some political folks lined up, but our fundraising’s just getting going-

Back to JOSH in the minivan.

JOSH (into phone)
- so we’re using volunteers for now.

TOBY (on phone)
Lot of money in the Latino community.

JOSH (into phone)
What would you think about a big education speech?

Back to TOBY’s office.

TOBY (into phone)
In New Hampshire, on his first trip?

Back to JOSH.

JOSH (into phone)
Yeah, it’s just an idea we’re kicking around.

TOBY (on phone)
Stop kicking.

JOSH (into phone)
Yeah.

Back to TOBY’s office.

TOBY (on phone)
Have you and Santos had the conversation yet?

JOSH (on phone)
Not yet.

TOBY (into phone)
Have the conversation.

Back to the minivan.

JOSH (into phone)
You think this whole campaign’s kinda goofy, don’t you?

Back to TOBY.

TOBY (into phone)
Yeah.

JOSH (on phone)
Uh, I’ll call you later.

TOBY (hanging up)
Yeah.

CUT TO: EXT. - TOWN STREET – DAY

The minivan pulls to a stop. JOSH and the VOLUNTEER get out. JOSH looks around, confused.

JOSH
This is a dry cleaner’s.

VOLUNTEER
I’m sorry, I – my mom asked me to pick up the dry cleaning on our way.

The VOLUNTEER heads inside as JOSH stares after him.

CUT TO: INT. - OFFICE – DAY

JOSH is meeting with a New Hampshire representive. The sign on his door reads ‘SENATOR BUTLER.’ BUTLER is opening his mail as he talks to JOSH.

BUTLER
I’ll be honest, Josh – I was surprised to see you split from Jed Bartlet like this.

JOSH
It’s no split, Senator.

BUTLER
Are you telling me Jed Bartlet’s not gonna be for his own Vice President? 

JOSH
He’s the leader of his own party, he’ll remain neutral till there’s a nominee (seeing BUTLER’s letter opener), is that … a Bob Russell letter opener?

BUTLER
VP gave it to me at the lunch caucus. I got the cup holders last month. So, what’s your boy Santez have to offer?

JOSH
It’s Santos, and – Russell may have the letter opener, but what’s in the envelope?

BUTLER
Might be some tie clips, who knows?

JOSH
Senator, you’re looking for the next Jed Bartlet, I’m telling you – it’s Santos. Top in his class at Annapolis, coalition-building mayor … he’s written more legislation than Bob Russell’s read, why do you think I left the White House to run this?

BUTLER
Well, you do give him credibility.

JOSH
Then meet with him. Pull some folks together for a coffee.

BUTLER
Hmm. John Hoynes gave a grand to my campaign; Russell gave 1500. Clarkson, too.

JOSH
Our fundraising’s just getting going, don’t, don’t make this about money.

BUTLER
Money equals viability. And from what I can tell, your boy has neither.

JOSH stares at BUTLER, raising his eyebrows.

CUT TO: EXT. - RESIDENTIAL STREET – DAY

NED walks up to the minivan as JOSH steps out.

JOSH
How’s it going?

NED
He’s been inside for a while.

JOSH
Good. Jardins are top-tier activists in Nashua.

NED
You got a message at headquarters from Will Bailey. He’s Bob Russell’s -

JOSH
Yeah. I’ve heard of him. Thanks.

NED
Wants to meet you this afternoon.

JOSH
He’s in New Hampshire?

NED
Advancing Russell’s next trip. How were your meetings?

JOSH
Met with three state legislators, they all want to know why I’m running Santos against Jed Bartlet’s own Vice President.

NED
Free country, isn’t it?

JOSH
Not if everyone thinks the President’s in Cowboy Bob’s saddlebag.

NED
The President’s son-in-law, Doug Westin, has a pretty tough race in the 1st District.

JOSH
Yeah, the, uh, environmentalists think he’s too pro-snowmobile. It’s like a bad ‘Grizzly Adams’ spinoff.

NED
You must know him pretty well. Maybe if he endorsed Matt …

JOSH (beat)
Put … put a call in to his office. See if Lizzy Bartlet has a minute to sit down with him.

NED
You gonna talk to the New York Times guy?

JOSH (excitedly)
New York Times guy?

NED motions to the side of the house, where GREG BROCK is talking on his cell phone. JOSH walks up to him.

BROCK (into phone)
Yeah. Just tell him to fax me when he gets in. Okay, gotta go.

JOSH
I didn’t expect the paper of record on our first trip.

BROCK
All the news that fits.

JOSH
You covering Russell?

BROCK
I’m covering this. Morgan from the Post, too.

JOSH
Really?

BROCK
Really.

JOSH
Well, for once, you’re writing the real story.

BROCK (scoffs)
How’s it going?

JOSH
Great, he was practically autographing deposit bottles at the Litchfield town dump.

BROCK
Well, those ought to be worth at least a nickel.

JOSH (smiling)
You want a sit-down with the Congressman?

BROCK
Maybe later. How long’s the New Hampshire swing?

JOSH
Ah, a couple of days.

BROCK
Well, I’m hearing some things out of Houston. May want to shorten your trip.

JOSH
What things?

BROCK
Well, he’s your candidate, I’m sure it’s nothing you don’t already know.

There’s a beat before JOSH heads inside the house.

CUT TO: INT. - JARDIN HOUSE – DAY

MATT is discussing education and the number of school days with JAMEY and JANICE JARDIN, using a small chalkboard to illustrate his points.

MATT
- especially given what’s happening around the world today, but … yes, I think it would make a huge difference. (as JOSH enters behind him) Jamey, Janice – this is Josh Lyman, my campaign manager. You know, another three terms in Congress and I don’t think my brow would be as furrowed as his.

JAMEY
We’ve known Josh for years, we ran this precinct for Bartlet both times.

JOSH
Mr. Jardin, Mrs. Jardin.

MATT
We’re talking about education.

JOSH (beat)
Did you know the Congressman was first in his family to go to college, top of his class at Annapolis, and can do more chin-ups than the entire Council on Foreign Relations?

MATT chuckles.

JANICE
I don’t know many people who’d be excited by a longer school year.

MATT
Now, I’ll be honest with you, neither do I. 

JOSH
We’re talking about a longer - ?

MATT
I’m not trying to excite people, I’m just trying to tell them what I think we need. America is 49th in the world in literacy, that’s down 18 spots in the last 50 years. Why? Well, for starters, the 180-day school year, that’s based on the agrarian calendar.

JANICE
So the kids can tend crops in the summer?

MATT
Right. But we’re in a global economy now. Japan’s at 243 days, Germany’s at 240 -

JOSH
Which is why we want a study, one of those big, thick – reports you spend months just, just, studying.

JAMEY
I got a pretty good education in 180 days; what does this have to do with what happens in my son’s classroom?

MATT
You know, not enough – which is why we need to end teacher tenure, and get rid of failing teachers.

JANICE
Our cousin Phyllis is a schoolteacher.

MATT
And I bet she’s a good one. Which is why she would keep her job.

JOSH
I need the Congressman for one moment - uh, scheduling problem.

JAMEY
Absolutely.

JANICE
Of course.

MATT rises to go with JOSH.

MATT
I keep telling him to call me ‘Matt.’ Excuse me.

JAMEY and JANICE chuckle. MATT follows JOSH out onto the porch.

MATT
I’m, uh – road-testing ideas for the speech.

JOSH
These are top-tier activists, you just fired their cousin Phyllis.

MATT
And next week, we’ll be training Phyllis in computer programming.

JOSH
You should be introducing yourself, talking about your personal narrative.

MATT
They asked for my views on education.

JOSH
Well, they didn’t like what they heard.

MATT
You’re right. So let’s not make Jamey Jardin our Secretary of Education, okay? Unfurrow your brow, Josh, I’ve run for office six times.

JOSH
In Texas. New Hampshire has an education funding crisis, they have no income tax, they can’t afford to pay for 60 more days of school.

MATT
Which is why we need to nationalize the system.

JOSH
That’s a half-trillion dollar joke you just made.

MATT
India and China are all investing in education like crazy, you want to leave it up to Nashua and Litchfield?

JOSH
These are all great ideas -

MATT
You were the one who said that this issue is stuck in the muck. This is how we unmuck it.

JOSH
The Jardins – don’t wanna be ‘unmucked.’ They want to know who you are, and once they get to like you -

MATT
We can move on to the swimsuit competition.

JOSH
Can we talk to the professors? Get a study, wait till we can afford, some research on this?

MATT
How long would that take?

JOSH
We’ve exhausted the donors in your district – one idea is a big fundraising drive in the Latino community. 

MATT
I don’t feel comfortable with that right now.

JOSH (beat)
It’s a huge donor base you alone can tap.

MATT
Josh, I don’t want to just be the brown candidate, I want to be the American candidate.

JOSH
How do you want to go broke, as the brown candidate or as the American candidate?

MATT
I looked at the daily spending reports. We don’t need to spend $4000 on yard signs.

JOSH reacts in frustration.

JOSH
You, you’re reviewing daily spending reports?

MATT
Let’s go back in with the Jardins, we can talk about this later.

JOSH
Congressman -

MATT
Call me Matt!

JOSH
These are all parts of a larger conversation, the Times is already digging around. Maybe other campaigns, too.

MATT
No.

JOSH
We need to get proactive.

MATT
No opposition research, no dirt on our opponents - !

JOSH
I know how to make this work, but you have to let me.

The screen door behind MATT opens and JANICE leans out.

JANICE
I don’t want you two to catch cold.

MATT
Our scheduling problem’s solved. (heading to the door) Let’s go back to that blackboard.

JOSH is left standing on the porch.

FADE OUT.
END ACT ONE.
* * *

ACT TWO

FADE IN: INT. - RUSSELL FOR PRESIDENT HEADQUARTERS – DAY

JOSH walks up the stairs to the office for Russell for President. There are several stand-up cardboard cutouts of Russell, holding up both thumbs approvingly, next to doorways and in an office. A STAFFER comes up to JOSH as he looks at the cutouts.

STAFFER
Folks love taking pictures with those. Almost like the real thing.

JOSH
Almost.

STAFFER
They talk a little less.

JOSH
Don’t say that too loud, his wife is gonna want one.

STAFFER
May I help you?

JOSH
I’m Josh Lyman, I’m here to see Will Bailey.

STAFFER
He’s expecting you. Follow me.

CUT TO: INT. - WILL’S OFFICE – DAY

WILL is on the telephone in his office, crowded by boxes and posters and whiteboards.

WILL (on phone)
The Vice President’s not missing the J-J dinner, either. If he has to break a tie on the ag bill, he’ll do a quick round trip on Air Force Two.

There is a knock at the door.

WILL (on phone)
Yeah.

WILL hangs up as JOSH enters.

WILL
How’s the Santos juggernaut?

JOSH
Juggering great. Just opened our New Hampshire offices.

WILL
I understand if there’s a tidal wave, you can paddle your way to safety.

JOSH
Our money’s going into the field.

WILL
Mind if one of my deputies sits in?

JOSH
It’s your meeting.

WILL picks up a phone.

WILL (into phone)
Would you step in here, please?

WILL hangs up.

JOSH
So why’d you want to see me?

DONNA enters the office, carrying a piece of paper. She doesn’t see JOSH as she talks to WILL.

DONNA
Hey, I’ve got that list of free media events for, uh, New Hampshire, broken down by media market, though some of the targets spill over the border into -

DONNA turns and sees JOSH standing there. They are both taken aback.

DONNA
- Vermont.

JOSH
Hi.

DONNA (smiling)
Hi.

WILL
I don’t know why people cling to this antiquated notion of states. For the purposes of Presidential campaigning, we really live in the United Media Markets of America, don’t we?

DONNA
Yeah.

WILL (to JOSH)
I’m not gonna waste your time, I’m sure you have boats to sink. The truth is we’re all friends, we’re all good Democrats, none of us wants a bloodied nominee, and I know you don’t want to attack the President’s record – also known as your record; also known as the Vice President’s record.

JOSH
He did clap at some of those bill signings, didn’t he?

JOSH and DONNA both seem uncomfortable, reluctant to look at one another.

WILL
Live on national television, yes, he did. I’m proposing a clean campaign. No attacks, a preemptive truce.

JOSH
I love what you’ve done with the place. It’s like the Mao Tse-tung school of interior decorating.

WILL
If you’re saying you’re not willing to rule out negative attacks on the Bartlet/Russell administration, I gotta tell you -

JOSH
I’ll take it to the Congressman. He decides what we rule in or out.

WILL
Good.

JOSH
Great.

JOSH turns and walks out of the office. DONNA follows him out to the hallway.

DONNA
Can we not make this a thing?

JOSH
It’s not a thing.

JOSH walks away.

CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN HEADQUARTERS – DAY

MATT is seated at a folding table, having a strategy session with NED and JOSH.

MATT
Okay, so, who’s next?

JOSH
I’m, setting up a dinner with the Jardins, a coffee with Keefe. This time, push your bio.

MATT
I understand this is retail politics, Josh, but how much time do we spend trying to get votes one by one?

JOSH
As much time as it takes to get some.

MATT (scoffing, exasperated)
Well, what about giving some bigger speeches, too, you know, talking to people, a thousand at a time?

NED
Thousand sounds better than one.

JOSH
We’ll get to the speeches, these are top-flight activists. They sign on, they’ll devote every waking hour, get three dozen of their friends to do the same.

RONNA appears behind MATT.

RONNA (offering a cell phone)
Matt … 

MATT (as he goes off to join RONNA with the phone)
I’m just wondering if Jefferson and Madison spent time having coffee in Litchfield.

A staffer hands NED a note.

NED
Ah, Liz Bartlet’s here to see Josh.

JOSH (to MATT)
We still have to have that conversation.

MATT (taking the phone from RONNA)
Hello.

JOSH leads LIZ BARTLET WESTIN to the upper office area of the campaign headquarters, with more inflatable rafts, life jackets and lifesaving rings strewn about.

JOSH
Thanks for coming all the way here, Liz, we could have done this at the house. (gesturing to rafts) This is for an event we’re doing on aquamarine – well, more maritime -

LIZ
‘Lose your boat, they’ll help you float.’

JOSH (pause)
Yeah. Your husband’s got a tough challenge with Bledsoe on his left.

LIZ
Doug’s been supporting the snowmobiling clubs for years, but to say he’s anti-environment … we’re giving an environmental speech next week. We can win back the greens.

JOSH
You still mad at me for having concerns about Doug’s campaign?

LIZ
Not at all.

JOSH
I’m glad.

LIZ
I’m mad at you for sharing those concerns with the D triple C and the White House Office of Political Affairs.

JOSH
Right.

LIZ
And if you think you’re getting Doug’s endorsement for a single-digit spoiler like Matthew Santos -

JOSH
We don’t want Doug’s endorsement.

LIZ
You don’t?

JOSH
No.

LIZ
No?

JOSH
No. (beat) Liz, you’ve been involved in New Hampshire primaries your whole life, you know why they matter. ‘Cause anyone has a shot here. ‘Cause the voters decide. 

LIZ
You only care about this primary ‘cause you want to win it.

JOSH
You’re right, and maybe that’s crazy, ‘cause Russell’s got all the money, all the institutional support, but I don’t think he should have it locked up before it starts. And the only reason he does, is everyone assumes that your dad is for him.

LIZ
My dad’s gonna stay neutral.

JOSH
If Doug did a photo op with Santos, no endorsement, just one lousy Kodak moment, it would be a psychic wink to your dad’s supporters that this primary is wide open. That the establishment hacks have to earn it – isn’t that how it should be? Isn’t that how your dad got the nomination eight years ago?

LIZ regards JOSH with a hint of a smile.

LIZ
I wouldn’t be doing this for you.

LIZ stands up and starts to leave, then stops.

LIZ
The Fickle Pickle diner in an hour and a half.

LIZ exits as JOSH takes a moment.

CUT TO: EXT. - STREET SCENE – DAY

A TV news truck is seen parked along the street, with a cameraman heading toward the sidewalk. JOSH is walking down the sidewalk and joins RONNA and NED, who are standing and  watching MATT talk with voters outside the Fickle Pickle. Several reporters and camera crews are also on the scene.

JOSH
Hey.

RONNA
Hey. He’s, ah, shaking hands out front while we wait for Doug Westin.

JOSH
The press corps seems to be growing.

NED
They’re covering Doug Westin.

JOSH
Right. Uh, we gotta put out a press statement when we get back to headquarters.

RONNA
On what?

JOSH
Dwarf tossing.

NED
Dwarf tossing?

JOSH
I told a Litchfield town selectman we would, there’s some bar over on Route 3, they put dwarfs in harnesses and toss them into hoops. He’s trying to ban it.

NED
We’d have spent more ink on dwarf tossing than on Medicare reform.

JOSH
Well, ask, ask a dwarf in a harness which matters more.

JOSH walks up to GREG BROCK.

JOSH
Hey, Greg.

BROCK
Hey, Josh.

JOSH
I want to make a deal on this Houston thing.

BROCK
It’s a bit late for that, everyone’s got it. (handing JOSH a piece of paper) Guess you guys are 0 for 2 this afternoon.

JOSH (looking at the paper)
0 for 2?

BROCK
Uh, this UNH professor, Stoller, Strober …

JOSH
What about him?

BROCK
He leaked the details of your education plan to the AP wire.

JOSH lets this sink in as we hear MATT talking to a group of voters.

MATT
If you do reconsider your support for the Vice President, I hope you’ll remember this conversation we had today. Have a great day, folks. Thank you. Thank you.

MATT walks away from the group and joins JOSH as they step off the sidewalk.

JOSH
Why did we put out an education plan?

MATT
We didn’t.

JOSH
This UNH guy, Strobe - light?

MATT
Strobner.

JOSH
He leaked it to the AP. You can’t be spreading this stuff around.

MATT
I faxed a few ideas to a couple of people, I -

JOSH
It shouldn’t be on paper.

MATT
Well, we talked about getting input for my speech.

JOSH
Look, we’re … we can’t do a speech. It hasn’t been scored, hasn’t been tested -

MATT
You mean killed by a bunch of consultants.

There is a pause. JOSH refers to the paper BROCK gave him.

JOSH
Someone is shopping an eight-year-old quote out of Houston. You said the New Hampshire primary shouldn’t come first because, quote, ‘The state’s as diverse as a Mayflower reunion.’

MATT (chuckling)
That’s a funny line.

JOSH
Yeah. A state full of Mayflower descendants laughing their heads off.

MATT
I don’t remember saying it.

JOSH
Can I deny it?

MATT
Yeah, it sounds like me, though.

JOSH
How fast can you take it back?

MATT
It’s true, isn’t it?

JOSH
People here feel this primary is their birthright. 

A car honks as it pulls up.

MATT
I, uh … I think I gotta stand by that.

JOSH
Okay. (referring to the car) Take the photo. Don’t take any questions, we’ll figure it out later. Go.

MATT heads onto the sidewalk as LIZ and DOUG WESTIN get out of the car and head for the diner. 

MATT
Hi.

DOUG
Congressman Santis, how are you?

MATT shakes hands with DOUG and LIZ.

LIZ
A pleasure to meet you.

MATT
I’m a big admirer of your family, I really appreciate you doing this.

DOUG
I can’t say I agree with your assessment of our primary.

MATT
Excuse me?

DOUG
Your quote.

MATT
You think the state’s diverse?

DOUG
Well, no one writes it, but, uh, New Hampshire is 30 percent Franco-American.

MATT
It’s funny that no one writes it.

MATT, LIZ and DOUG head into the diner. As they go, DOUG calls out to JOSH.

DOUG
So, Josh, how’s it feel to be out of Washington? Nice?

JOSH (following them)
Yeah.

We move inside the diner, where a group of reporters and photographers are there as the candidates greet voters in the booths.

DOUG
Hi, Doug Westin. Running for Congressman in the First District.

MATT greets other diners.

REPORTER 1
Bledsoe says you’d shut down the national parks if the snowmobilers wanted it.

DOUG
I care very deeply about our parks.

REPORTER 2
Deeply enough to restrict snowmobiles, as your opponent’s challenged you to do?

DOUG
We’re gonna have a lot to say about our parks.

BROCK
Congressman Santos, you’ve had some tough words about this state’s primary.

MATT
We’re here to meet the voters.

DOUG
But you don’t value our votes, do you?

There is an uncomfortable pause as photographers’ cameras click away.

MATT
Oh, I value everyone’s vote.

DOUG
Well, then, why don’t you apologize for what you said about this state’s primary? Why don’t you acknowledge, here and now, our role as the presidential wine-tasters of America? I could never support a candidate who doesn’t.

MATT (staring down DOUG)
Well, you know, I’m not much of a wine drinker. And I’m sorry if I won’t have your support. (going to another voter) Hi. I’m Matt Santos. I’m running for President.

JOSH watches glumly.

CUT TO: EXT. - MOTEL – NIGHT

The SUV we saw earlier pulls up to a motel room. We can hear MATT speaking inside the car.

MATT (VO)
… every substitute teacher in Peoria deciding our long-term competitiveness, unless we want to completely balkanize the education system – from Maine, to Michigan, to Montana – a high school diploma has to mean something, the same thing, or we’re walking away from our biggest responsibility.

MATT, JOSH, NED, and RONNA get out of the car.

JOSH
The Congressman and I need to talk about the schedule.

MATT
We got to get a little better code language than that.

NED and RONNA head into a motel room while JOSH opens the door to another.

MATT (to NED and RONNA)
See you. (to JOSH) I gotta call my kids before they go to bed.

JOSH leads MATT into the motel room.

JOSH
Eh, this won’t take long.

MATT and JOSH uneasily settle into the room. JOSH throws his bag on one bed, MATT takes off his topcoat. After a moment, they look at each other.

JOSH
I know this isn’t what you thought it would be.

MATT
Yeah … I had a loose understanding that running for President had something to do with public policy.

JOSH
Every first-time candidate makes mistakes, the good ones fix them, don’t make the same ones twice.

MATT
Well, we’re stuck with this one. I got to give that speech at Hawk’s house tomorrow night -

JOSH
You have to shelve the education plan. You have to swallow the Mayflower quote.

MATT
You, uh, want me to introduce myself to the electorate as a flip-flopper?

JOSH
As opposed to a piece of political toast - yes, I do.

MATT
Do you think this state represents the country?

JOSH
I think it’s – 30 percent Franco-American. I think it decides our future. 

MATT
If I wanted coffee klatches and recycled cans, I would run for Congress again.

JOSH
We need to sell you first, then we’ll get to the big issues.

MATT
Meaning not in New Hampshire.

JOSH
Meaning once people get to know who you are.

MATT (standing to leave)
Right. Let me finish doing what I’m doing, I’m gonna call my kids, thanks -

JOSH
Congressman, we’re having this conversation -

MATT
Call me Matt -

JOSH
I don’t wanna call you Matt! You think this is any other campaign? You think you’ve been scrutinized and poked and prodded like a prize-winning pig, well, you haven’t. You just walked into a great big X-ray machine - everything shows up. People with 30 years in public life get blown out of these things after two weeks -

MATT
This is an eight-year-old quote. I have given thousands of interviews -

JOSH
Which is why we have to go over everything – what you’ve said, what you’ve done, who your enemies are, what years you were late on your taxes, whether, God forbid, you’ve had problems in your marriage -

MATT
And if I did, it’s between me and my wife.

JOSH
Nothing is disqualifying if I know it now. If I had known about that quote, we would have skipped New Hampshire till we fixed it.

MATT
Do you agree with it? Tell me if you agree with it.

JOSH
I think whoever fed it to the press has gotta have more, and that’s our priority right now.

MATT
Whose campaign is this, Josh?

JOSH
I don’t know, who flew down to Houston and talked you into it?

MATT turns to leave.

JOSH
Instead of tinkering with pie-in-the-sky education programs, maybe you’d better figure out why you’re running, and if you are sure … that you are really up to this.

MATT
The education plan is why I’m running. I’m gonna go call my kids instead of standing here and being treated like one.

MATT walks out of the motel room.

FADE OUT.
END ACT TWO.
* * *

ACT THREE

FADE IN: INT. - SMALL TOWN CAFE – DAY

JOSH is sitting at a table with JOEY LUCAS. KENNY is also there as the sign language interpreter.

JOSH
Thanks for flying up on short notice.

JOEY (through KENNY)
Of course.

JOSH
We can’t afford any polling just yet.

JOEY (through KENNY)
I know.

JOSH
I don’t suppose you’ve seen any with Santos in the mix?

JOEY (through KENNY)
Two private polls. He’s within the margin of error.

JOSH
Of who?

JOEY (through KENNY)
Of having any support at all.

JOSH
Oh.

JOEY (through KENNY)
Quite a press day you’re having.

JOSH (chuckles)
Uh, yeah. (referring to newspapers on the table) The Union Leader says he’d create an income tax to pay for his education plan. The Monitor is saying he should take the Mayflower back to Houston. Worst of all, none of it made the front page.

JOEY (through KENNY)
When he reads the papers, he’ll become more pliable.

JOSH
I don’t want him to be pliable, I, I, I want him to -

JOEY (through KENNY)
Agree with you in the first place?

JOSH
I know how to run these. If, if he’d just – let me.

JOEY (through KENNY)
It’s your job, Josh. But it’s his life.

JOSH
And this guy’s nothing but potential, why else would Brock and Morgan be covering our first trip? But it’s like … he doesn’t get this. He doesn’t get what this is.

JOEY (through KENNY)
Give him time. He’s a long way from Houston. (handing over a manila envelope) The first of the opposition research you wanted. Everyone does it now.

JOSH (taking the envelope; quietly)
Yeah.

JOSH stands to leave.

JOEY (through KENNY)
You can pay me in installments. Small ones.

JOSH mouths ‘thank you’ to JOEY.

JOEY
Josh? (beat) You should have done this weeks ago.

CUT TO: EXT. - WHITE MOUNTAIN MANOR RETIREMENT LIVING – DAY

The SUV pulls up outside the retirement home. MATT is reading the Concord Monitor while JOSH is driving.

MATT
I can’t believe this.

JOSH sighs.

MATT
We don’t get any points for substance?

JOSH
Uh, it’s right there, column three, next to penmanship.

MATT
What about the teachers’ unions?

JOSH
They ignored it, they didn’t want to make it a national story. Look – I added this event yesterday so you could take back the Mayflower crack. It’s a senior center, it’s a large and a captive audience, we’re gonna pay a surprise visit to the state’s oldest voter.

MATT
Del Tollerson.

JOSH
He’s, like, 197. Granddaddy of the primary since it was Old Hampshire. Take back what you said, he forgives you, crisis over.

They walk in the door of the senior center. BROCK and another REPORTER are standing next to the door, as well as a couple of photographers.

REPORTER
Oh, there he is.

MATT and JOSH walk into the reception area. There is a MAN behind the reception desk. We see a small number of seniors through a doorway sitting in what appears to be the dining area. JOSH walks up to the desk.

JOSH
Hi.

MAN
Morning.

JOSH
Shouldn’t there be a crowd here? Don’t tell me they’re out playing jai-alai.

MAN
Oh, one of our residents died. Everyone’s at the funeral.

JOSH
I suppose Del Tollerson’s there, too.

MAN
Oh, I’d say so. He’s in the coffin.

JOSH (quietly)
I see.

JOSH walks back to MATT, as the reporters and photographers squeeze in behind him.

MATT
I don’t think I should defuse this with a joke.

MATT shakes hands with the MAN as he heads into the dining area to chat with the seniors.

MATT
Matt Santos.

BROCK comes up behind JOSH.

BROCK
Good staff work.

JOSH
We’re a scrappy insurgency, okay, we’re taking our licks early.

BROCK
That’s a lot of licks for someone who’s a non-factor in the race.

JOSH
If Santos was a non-factor, I doubt you and the Post would be sipping strained beets at the Nashua Senior Center.

BROCK
You’re serious.

JOSH
What?

BROCK
We’re not writing about Santos. We’re writing about you. Why you’re running this quixotic campaign, why you’re splitting up the field.

JOSH
We’re running to win.

BROCK
By thumbing your nose at the first primary, proposing the largest ever expansion of education in a state that can’t afford to pay for notebooks?

JOSH
We’re talking about the big issues.

BROCK
I think you’re siphoning off votes to help Hoynes. Why else would Russell’s folks be worried about you?

JOSH blinks, thinking.

CUT TO: INT. - RUSSELL CAMPAIGN HEADQUARTERS – DAY

WILL is going over a list with a STAFFER.

WILL
I want guns off the list, I want choice off the list.

STAFFER
Eastern Pennsylvania’s overwhelmingly anti-gun and pro-choice.

WILL
Yeah, but the people who aren’t vote on those issues alone. Take them off the list.

As the STAFFER leaves WILL’s office, another WORKER follows, saying, ‘I’ll give you a hand.’ As they exit, we see JOSH standing in the doorway.

WILL
You know what I’m realizing is hardest about a Presidential? Delegating to people you barely know.

JOSH
You fed that quote to Brock. You’re trying to force me out of the race.

WILL
Last time I checked, you’re not in the race.

JOSH
You talked to Brock. He told me you were worried about us.

WILL
Well, you turned down a job with Russell, you recruit a nobody to run against us. I’m worried because it doesn’t make any sense.

JOSH
So you dig up damaging quotes?

WILL
I didn’t have to. It was probably Texas Republicans trying to kill him off so he can’t run for state treasurer.

JOSH
If Santos isn’t serious, why’d you trot Donna out to guilt me?

WILL
I’m not guilting anybody, you should be guilting yourself. After Leo, you’re the best political mind in the party, and you’re gonna be working for us, everyone is, it’s inevitable – when that day comes, do you want to be on the record trashing us so we can’t hire you?

JOSH turns and walks out. As he heads down the stairs WILL punches a button on his phone.

WILL (into phone)
Tell Roger and Ellen to come back in here.

CUT TO: EXT. - SIDEWALK – DAY

MATT is speaking to several voters as they stand next to a number of blue mailboxes.

MATT
Look, I’m not saying it’s gonna come without a cost. Education is at the heart of everything that we care about; competitiveness, opportunity, equality. Shouldn’t we, uh, figure out what we need first, and then get into the details?

WOMAN
So you’re saying, no tax increase?

We see JOSH and RONNA a short distance away from the crowd as a minivan pulls up. DONNA gets out of the vehicle. MATT continues to speak in the background.

DONNA (walking up to JOSH and RONNA)
Hi.

JOSH
Hi.

DONNA (to RONNA)
Hi.

RONNA
Hi. Ronna.

DONNA
Actually, it’s Donna.

RONNA
Uh, no, it’s Ronna.

DONNA
No, really, it’s Donna.

RONNA
Uh, I’m quite certain it’s -

JOSH
Ronna, it’s Donna, Donna, it’s Ronna.

DONNA and RONNA smile at one another.

JOSH (to RONNA)
Give us a minute?

RONNA
Sure.

RONNA walks away.

DONNA
She should stick around. Your whole campaign is like some Dr. Suess nightmare. One Fish, Two Fish, Dead Fish, We-fought-the-good-fight Fish.

JOSH
As opposed to The Cat in the Imitation Cowboy Hat Fell Flat?

DONNA 
Go ahead. Hop On Bob.

JOSH
You should be with me. You’re on the wrong campaign.

DONNA
You’re right, I let Russell seduce me with mindless perks like a salary and actual political support.

JOSH
What make-work job do they even have you doing over there?

DONNA
Media targeting for the Northeast and Pacific Northwest.

There is a pause.

JOSH
Fine, we’re still the ones with the gutsy education plan, the ones speaking the truth about the New Hampshire primary.

DONNA
You know what Russell’s been speaking about on his trips here?

JOSH
I didn’t know chipboard could talk.

DONNA
White Mountains preservation, MTBE, textile conversion, local issues.

JOSH
You mean, pandering.

DONNA
I mean what voters want. Campaigns are about them, not us. You taught me that.

Several staffers walk up from the minivan carrying large tubs full of letters.

JOSH
You came here to deliver my old truisms?

DONNA
Close. Letters from Russell supporters to the DNC, urging them to protect the New Hampshire primary.

A photographer snaps pictures as DONNA leads the staffers and their letters to the mailboxes where MATT is speaking.

DONNA
You ought to deliver some of those truisms yourself.

CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN HEADQUARTERS – DAY

JOSH is coming up the steps to the upper office. He is surprised to see one of the stand-up cardboard cutouts of Russell there, with a red ribbon around its neck.

JOSH
Least you could do is send me the one with the noose. Eh, maybe Will’s right. (he pulls out a marker from the desk) Maybe you are the man of destiny. I just wish you’d filled out a little sooner, is all.

JOSH draws a handlebar mustache on the face of the Russell cutout. A VOLUNTEER calls out from the ground floor.

VOLUNTEER
Mr. Lyman?

JOSH
Yeah?

JOSH peers over the balcony.

VOLUNTEER
A call for you. A Mr. Potus on the line?

JOSH runs down the stairs and grabs the phone.

JOSH (into phone)
This is Josh Lyman.

OPERATOR (on phone)
Please hold for the President.

BARTLET (on phone)
Liz tells me you look like hell.

JOSH (into phone)
Yeah, well, hell’s just another word for far-from-home-without-your-mittens-on.

We see BARTLET on the phone in the Oval Office.

BARTLET (into phone)
Sorry about what happened with Doug. If you ever have daughters, Josh, don’t let ‘em run off and marry pinheads.

JOSH (on phone)
He’s in a tough race, I deserved it.

BARTLET (into phone)
Naw, you took a bullet for me, I’m the one who didn’t want Doug to run.

The scene cuts back and forth between JOSH and BARTLET.

JOSH (into phone)
I was just doing my job.

BARTLET (into phone)
I know it looks like I’m for Russell, but I want a vigorous primary.

JOSH (on phone)
I know that, sir.

BARTLET (into phone)
If I speak out, it sends all kinds of wrong signals.

JOSH (on phone)
I know.

BARTLET (into phone)
Take down these numbers.

JOSH (into phone, looking for a pen and paper)
Numbers on … ?

BARTLET (on phone)
Just take ‘em down. (beat) Six to 24 over six.

JOSH (on phone, writing the numbers on a matchbook cover)
And this is … ?

BARTLET (into phone)
New Hampshire’s dropout rate. (on phone) It fell from sixth lowest in the nation to 24th in the last six years. They’re highest in the region now. (into phone) I haven’t done enough – Santos should say that. People have to know why he’s talking about education, why he’s in this, what he’s running against. I haven’t done enough. (on phone) It might as well be me. See you when you visit Washington sometime?

JOSH (into phone)
Yes, sir. Sometime. 

We hear a dial tone as the line disconnects. JOSH lights a match and burns the matchbook in an ashtray.

FADE OUT.
END ACT THREE.
* * *

ACT FOUR

FADE IN: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN HEADQUARTERS – NIGHT

Three REPORTERS are interviewing JOSH as he sits on a table.

REPORTER 1
The Democratic Leader says your education plan’s poison for New Hampshire.

JOSH
We respect his views, and we look forward to discussing them in person.

REPORTER 2
He says after Mayflowergate he won’t meet with Santos -

JOSH
Come on, that’s a ‘gate’ already? No way does that qualify as a ‘gate.’

A volunteer hands a note to JOSH.

REPORTER 3
So, you’re not consulting the teachers’ unions, you’re not identifying revenue streams -

JOSH
Let me tell you what we are doing, we’re trying to solve maybe the most serious long-term problem in this country, and of course it’s going to be controversial. Of course the status quo is gonna go nutty-bananas, but, uh, where are the other candidates’ education plans? Tell me who’s got an alternative, tell me that.

JOSH walks away and out of the office onto the sidewalk. He finds MATT there taking off his gloves.

JOSH
You wanna talk about the schedule?

MATT
I wanted to talk about today’s spending report. You, uh, hired Joey Lucas to do opposition research after I told you not to?

JOSH
Congressman -

MATT
After I told you that we weren’t gonna smear other Democrats.

JOSH
Research isn’t on them, it’s on you.

MATT is taken aback.

JOSH
I don’t know you. I, I don’t know what you’ve said, what you’ve done, I have to know!

MATT
And if a teacher smacked me with a ruler in the third grade, that’s gonna help you sell my education plan? If I changed positions on the Lindbergh baby, that’s worth having me investigated?

JOSH
Your brother hasn’t worked in five years. You’re supporting him.

MATT scoffs.

JOSH
And I need to know if you’ve ever tried to put him on a government payroll. I need to know if you’ve ever made any phone calls -

MATT
Leave him out of this! How the hell did she get that?

JOSH
Same way everyone else is gonna get it.

MATT
Well, we’d better stop doing this like everyone else, we’d better stop it right now.

JOSH
You don’t get to run this as a test-case on family privacy any more than you get to pick which states are ready for big podium speeches.

MATT turns away, rubbing his head.

MATT
I’m not trying to make this a test case. Come on! We’re lucky if we have two months with this! I’m gonna waste it shaking hands!

Now JOSH is taken aback.

JOSH
Two months? (beat) I gave up everything for this, you’re not even in it to win?

MATT
Maybe we have a different definition of winning, Josh. Maybe that’s what we should’ve talked about in Houston.

JOSH is left speechless as MATT walks away down the sidewalk.

CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN OFFICE – NIGHT

JOSH is carrying the cardboard standup of Bob Russell down the stairs. He’s carrying it inside a metal trashcan, and the standup has a red ribbon around the neck. RONNA comes up behind JOSH as he reaches the first floor.

RONNA
What’s that?

JOSH
It’s called a clean campaign.

RONNA (handing JOSH some papers)
I’m not hip to all this campaign jargon.

JOSH
These are … ?

RONNA
Statements from the other campaigns, promising education plans by next week. (beat) No one was talking about it, now they all are. Hoynes challenged the whole field to debate education. We’re moving the debate, Josh.

RONNA walks away as JOSH looks at the statements. LIZ comes into the office and walks up to JOSH.

LIZ
Don’t take that to the Litchfield town dump. It’ll still win more votes than your guy.

JOSH puts the trashcan with the standup on the floor.

JOSH
I deserved … what you did to us at the Fickle Pickle.

LIZ
I didn’t do anything. That was Doug. I practically poured a bucket of paint on his head when we got home. We said all along we wouldn’t endorse anyone.

JOSH
Really?

LIZ
Tons of our supporters are leaning toward Russell, tons are leaning toward Hoynes.

JOSH
At least a few have to be leaning toward us.

LIZ
Not really. But your guy has one hell of an education plan. My dad thinks so, too. Only campaign that’s saying much of anything.

JOSH 
Does this mean you and I are -

LIZ
No. I still think you’re a jerk.

LIZ pulls a check out of her pocket and hands it to JOSH.

JOSH
What’s this?

LIZ
A personal check.

JOSH
You’re, donat – you’re – giving Matt Santos $2000?

LIZ
Yeah. Sorry, that’s the federal limit.

JOSH
Liz, this goes on a publicly disclosed donor list. This is a Bartlet family contribution to Santos for President.

LIZ
Funny thing about the FEC – they really like it when you report this stuff.

LIZ starts to walk away.

JOSH
Don’t give the environmental speech. 

LIZ
What do you mean?

JOSH
Don’t give it. Doug’s for snowmobiles. Maybe it’s bad politics, but it’s where he is.

LIZ
That’s the dumbest thing I ever heard.

LIZ walks away. JOSH shows the check to RONNA as she comes up to him.

RONNA
Wh – what do we do with this?

JOSH
Cash it, fast as we can. See how many Matt Santos letter openers it’ll buy.

CUT TO: EXT. - OUTSIDE HAWK’S HOUSE – NIGHT

The SUV pulls to a stop. We hear MATT and NED talking inside.

MATT (VO)
Speech insert on teachers?

NED (VO)
More training and higher salaries, greater accountability.

MATT (VO)
Good. Thanks.

JOSH, MATT, and NED get out of the car. JOSH and NED start heading for the house, as MATT stops.

MATT
Whoa, whoa. Where is, uh, Hawk’s house?

JOSH
This is it, this is Phil Hawk’s house.

MATT
I thought it was a venue, a … a speech, not a, another three-person grip and grin.

JOSH
Phil’s one of the premier activists in …

MATT walks past JOSH into the yard, sighing heavily. JOSH turns and slowly goes to him.

JOSH
What I said about … putting your brother on the government payroll, that was out of line.

MATT
You were just doing your job.

JOSH
I don’t know what you want my job to be. For days now I’ve … been trying to get my head around this rationale. I used to tell candidates, ‘Make it about the voters, not about you.’ But the difference is, you are them. Working-poor background, kids in public school, brother with a high school diploma, he can barely read.

MATT
And what does that all amount to besides a lousy stereotype?

JOSH
It’s why you’re in this, it’s why you’re talking about education. What’s, wrong with telling people that? Especially in New Hampshire, where people think their vote is the most personal thing they have to give?

MATT
Have you taken one moment to think about whether you even like my education plan – pop psychology aside, whether it’s actually right for the country?

JOSH
I didn’t have to hear it to know it’d be right.

MATT (beat)
I do want to win, you know. But I can’t do it by being just another cardboard cutout – even if it is smart tactics. 

JOSH
You can’t run a national campaign on your own. No one can.

MATT sighs and turns away.

MATT
New Hampshire’s over with, isn’t it?

JOSH
Well, you’re not making it easy.

MATT
Hmm, well, you know … if we’re gonna do this, I’m not gonna make it easy. I’m gonna give the big speeches and I’m gonna push every limit and that’s the campaign you get to run.

JOSH
And what if I can’t make that work?

MATT
Well, then no one can.

There is a pause. MATT gives a quick nod and then he and JOSH head for the house. MATT stops at the porch steps.

MATT
Uh, when you get the rest of that research, uh … we’ll go over it together.

They head inside. NED and RONNA are standing in the hallway. There are several children in the living room. RONNA gestures toward the kitchen, and MATT heads that way, taking off his coat. He finds a large group of a dozen or so people, waiting to meet with him.

MATT
Good evening. Hi, how are you?

JOSH, NED and RONNA follow MATT into the kitchen as MATT continues greeting the attendees.

MATT
Hello, sir. Thank you for inviting us. Good evening. Hi.

VOTER
Nice to meet you.

MATT
Good evening.

JOSH (to RONNA)
This is more people than we expected.

RONNA (quietly)
Yeah, some of the neighbors came.

JOSH (quietly)
Because?

RONNA (quietly)
Mostly ‘cause they think he’s nuts – but … they’re curious, and that ain’t nothing.

MATT (to crowd)
Good evening, folks.

JOSH (whispering)
No, that ain’t nothing.

MATT (to crowd)
Well, as you all know, I’m Matt Santos, that kamikaze candidate from Texas. (laughter) Well, I didn’t leave my home and my family so that I could stand around town dumps telling you all what you want to hear. I’ve faced some things in my life, my own family, that make me believe that we need to rethink our whole education system,

The screen fades to black as we hear MATT continue.

MATT (VO)
- and if that’s something that’s going to make it harder for me as a candidate, well, then, I’ll just have to take it.

DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES.
FADE TO BLACK.
THE END.
* * *

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The West Wing Transcript
Episode 6X11 – Opposition Research
Original Airdate: January 12, 2005